Hi all, I moved to Perth when I was 19. My Dad lives here, as does my half sister and brother, my half sister had just had a little boy and it all seemed so appealing to be a hands on aunt whilst living in Paradise.
I got a child visa, but it was declined once and the whole process was so painful, I was so homesick and couldn't leave the country until my visa was permitted. The day I got the news that I was granted the visa, I got on a flight and went home to visit. I stayed 2 weeks and came back, miserable, depressed and unsure what I was doing here. From then it really spiralled, I think then I knew where I wanted to be and it wasn't here, but because it was so expensive to get the visa and it was so hard and all the rest, I stayed it out. I moved into a gorgeous apartment on Adelaide Terrace, with a new friend. I made more new friends and it was great.
Then some things happened, sexual assaults involved etc and I couldn't stomach Perth, so I left and went home.
I stayed for a year, found a cool little job, but then moved into a job that I grew to hate, to the point it made me sick. I thought that returning to Perth would fix everything and that I'd find an amazing job and be super happy and all the rest.
As the time came closer to coming back to Perth, I just wasn't excited. I couldn't get excited. I was totally demotivated.
I put this down to the stress of my job..
I didn't even pack until one day before I left, and I finished packing on the day that I left, with help from my mum.
As soon as it was time to leave the house I was in tatters. Snot, tears, trembling lip, clutching onto a damp tissue..
I got to the airport and even after I checked in, I wasn't excited, still. I thought this is strange, last time I remember being sad but excited to come to Perth!
It came to having to say goodbye to my parents and I sobbed. I sobbed loudly like a child and they kept saying "Come on doll, chin up, this is what you want!" and I thought to myself, no, this is what I thought I wanted.
I got through to the departures gate and found a disabled toilet to bawl in. I cried the entire journey to Perth, and even when I got here, saw my Dad at the airport and had a long chat with him, I still felt like I wanted to be home.
This is when I knew I wasn't just numb and a bit stressed, this is when I knew I didn't want to be apart from my Mum and Stepdad forever.
My flight landed at 1:30 am and at about 4:00am I told my Stepdad I was coming home. I then told my Dad the following day and he was surprisingly fine with it..
You know, Australia is gorgeous, on the surface. Sure there are loads of opportunities and the weather is great and there are loads of cheap and free activities, of course.
But for me, nothing, not even constant blue skies can replace the love and warmth for my family at home.
Australia will always hold a very special place in my heart, not just because of family here, but because I've had a really nice time here. It taught me a lot about who I want to be and why.
But it's the UK for me, if my parents could come here permanently I wouldn't think twice about it, but they can't. So I can't stay, but I will holiday!!
If there's one piece of advice I can give it's to always trust your instinct.
I'm now going to work to pay for my flight home and then that's it for me, I'm going back, and I can't blooming wait.