Bobo81

Hi, so sorry to hear of your situation. I do know what it's like to not have settled and just want to go home. The fact that your contemplating doing this even without your husband means you must be so unhappy right now. I can imagine, when you are feeling so fragile and your husband is simply putting his foot down that you are both probably just going round and round in circles and not having many constructive conversations. This is probably not going to do you , your husband or kids any good at all. Is it at all possible to take some time out, a trip home with your kids to give you both a little bit of breathing and thinking space?I know this isn't always possible because of finances, schooling etc but if it was in an attempt to save your relationship it may be worth it in the long term. You said your husband would be able to visit regularly if you went back alone so perhaps he could go back after a few weeks of you being over there to discuss the future? You may feel a bit stronger and clearer then, after having some support from home and will be able to have a more productive chat about what you both want. Sending you lots of positive thoughts, I hope you guys sort something out xx

Thanku for this, it's good to see how others have felt and to hear something other than its not long enough. I suppose for me it was a bit of a shock to have just not settled at all in any way. I left home for uni in my late teens and never moved back to where i was originally from, we have moved around in the uk a bit due to my husbands job and I would never have really thought of us as being home birds. Although we have a support network back at home this wasn't depended on a day to day basis, our nearest family member was at least a few hrs away. It really is a case of just not really enjoying living here, its just not for everyone. And yep-its sometimes strange the things that actually make me say "that's it I want to go home". Going to stay bit longer though and enjoy some of the nice weather that's to come. I don't feel as trapped now knowing that we have decided to move back next year but i have felt very much like this over the last couple of months, Suburban life is def not for me and that is really where we can expect to live due to work commitments and again, what we can afford. Sounds like you have tried to make it work, having already tried one move. Moving as a family is something i really think you have to be completely behind! I hope you and your family enjoy the rest of your time in oz and it's great that you are taking so many positives from it. The uk is a great place for family life too, kids aren't bothered about the weather at all and there's always lots going on. I can imagine any regrets we are feeling now will subside, we will hopefully also be taking lots of positives back with us.

I can understand most of the points being made here. I just don't agree with putting a generic timeframe on something that is so unique to each person who makes the move. All our circumstances and experiences are probably very different. I think aus is a beautiful country and have seen some lovely places but for us as a family our quality of life was better in the uk. I don't think either country is better than the other, just different. I enjoyed our day to day living more there, the general mon to fri stuff. We had more to do as a young family ( due to affordability and also based on where we lived, things were more accessible) i will appreciate these things when we return so much more. For me 6 months is long enough to realise this and I think by saying returning before that 2yr mark is a failure is too much pressure. This surely turns it into an endurance test if you are not happy or enjoying it. We are not heading home straight away but I agree that when you know you just know.

We have been here for just over 6 months, thought about a move within oz but I don't really think that would help. Also I think it's something you would have to believe in 100% to work and after our experiences over the last few months im not feeling that brave. I know most people think that is not long enough to have given it a proper go but I feel moving home is the right thing to do for us as a family, doesn't add up for us to be here, financially and emotionally.

Have just signed up on here as came across these posts when we were researching moving back to the uk from oz. my husband and I would agree that a big part of us regrets coming over as we have spent so much money that could have been spent on a home back in the uk and towards our kids future. We should have researched the move a little better I feel as we had no idea how expensive Australia actually is to live. Also the move can put a huge strain on relationships and I feel we have both suffered emotionally which is bound to have rubbed off on our kids- even if you try to hide it. i do feel though that we couldn't have not taken the opportunity and it's important to try new things, I just feel we maybe got timing wrong as I am a stay at home mum with two very young children, not the best stage in life to move away from support networks. I think it's important to remain positive and even though I am looking forward to going home and sorting things out, I intend to see a little bit more of oz and have some fun family memories to take back with us. This move was much harder than we both anticipated even though we knew it was not going to be easy(we have family who moved out here and found it very hard to settle at first, they now love it and would not go back-they live in a different part of oz to us)