BUSIMOLL

Thanks for the post. I had 3 born in UK, a surprise 4th, born in Aus, and my concern for last babe, was her nationality - Aus (me) & Brit dad. To get a Brit passport + citizenship when we travel this year. In UK as we weren't married at the time our first two took my (mother's) nationality, not automatically Brits, and had to 'apply' for citizenship - altho they were born there, and had dad's name on the birth certificate (he was mighty peeved at that!) We got married before having No.3 in UK, so no probs there. But now with No.4 - am worried that her UK citizenship/passport can't be passed on to her kids. Or that there will be problems with her getting UK citizenship. Mind you with my first three, we had to apply for them to be Aussie citizens by descent, (as they were born overseas) and we had to apply twice - for first two before we were married for both Brit and Aus citizenshiop (argh)... . Hope that makes sense.

Just saw your post, and yep, the only constraint for you is the time limit for IELTS... which may be destiny to go forward and have a go. Now that you have nothing to hold you back - as far as ties, then you are a free agent to explore the world. The worst that can happen - new experiences, a breath of fresh air, a new start. & if Aus isnt' your cup of tea, you can move on. I only read page one of replies, so apologies if things have unfolded further. Good luck, maybe this is that 'open window' when you see all other doors shut and feel pretty low. Hope you find your smile again, small steps, one day at a time. x

Oh sweetheart, I hear you! You have your 'home' back 'home', and know how you feel. Im born bred here, but after 16yrs in UK, feel I'm from there, and coming back here was a mistake! I'd love to up and go, and like you, sucked down the plughole with the rat-race of all that is keeping up with cafe society & kids education and extra curricular stuff. even just insurance is crippling - but worse if you don't have it. It's really hard. I think you are doing the right thing clearing your debts, makes that fresh start back home so inviting & you'll not have the past hanging over you with debts to clear and paying exchange rates to send money over, and you don't want to leave the country as a bad debter, it may follow you when you travel later. Also if you can ebay stuff to just get rid of things you don't need, to add to the 'savings piggy bank' for moving home. Car finance...yup we were the same - couldn't get credit so got a dealer car second hand and finance has us stuck in - & a lemon to boot! Lucky tho' the extra warranty has paid for a lot! I hear you on a lot of levels. We are sinking and I miss our house, tho' I don't miss the area it's in, we'd prob live somewhere else. But just glad we have our place there. We're even talking about retirement - that we'd move back to Europe, can't afford to retire here (just had 4th babe - unexpected/unplanned, and already finances are tight) so retirement a long way off, and unattainable like it was in UK. My gorgeous 1st boy misses UK too. We don't talk of missing UK, but he obviously hasn't taken to Aus like we'd hoped. Then neither have I, and hubby is finding it a real struggle emotionally, and financially too. We're travelling to South Africa and UK in June/July, and it's taken all our savings - when we could have just up and gone back - just too hard to relocate with 4 kids right now. An Irish friend whose hubby is FIFO in Perth - so she sees him 1 week in 4, is flying home for good with her kids. Due to the cost of travelling back there for a family anniversary, it's so expensive, she may as well go back permanently, and hubby can 'fly home' while she's got the support of family there, here she's got no one. (ie not family, old friends). I completely understand. Even just the creepy crawlies get me, leeches, ticks, spiders. Got bitten by a spider and had a bad reaction - called the health line, they called an ambulance, travelled 16kms to the hosp and was charged almost $400 for the priviledge... the reaction from opening the 'invoice' was as scary as the reaction to the darn spider bite! sheesh... I'll get over my phobia of frogs and move back in a flash! Good luck and know there are people who are wishing you well, just think every day is one day closer... and smile (fake it till you make it) thru those tears!

I'm the opposite (in a sense) but feel the same: born/bred Aus, escaped at 21 o/seas and didn't come back for 16yrs, been back with husband and 3 kids for 18mths, and while there's so much lovely stuff here, UK is home for me in so many ways listed in the first post. and Brummie39, country air and close to Europe - well, I'd be away every weekend if we moved back - esp Wales camping. The Aussie dream is just too expensive, and maybe being "too close" to my family is just too much. Glad to hear some are going back and enjoying it. I'm just waiting to feel like 'I'm home' ... apart from the passport, it doesn't feel like that yet, for me or the kids, although we are all fully involved in lots of hobbies. Glad to those who have moved to Aus and feel like they are 'home'... have friends moving back to S.Africa (husband's job, wife is devastated!) so losing friends to overseas too... if only for 5 yrs... just feel so "isolated" in a big country here... ps to my Aussie friends and old school mates - I sound like the Brit (and I'm happy to be considered so). x

Hi honey, saw your post and I am so sorry. I lost our cat 9 months after coming out and posted about it, ours was tick-related. (Devastated, cat from UK in Jan 2010, died from tick paralysis Oct 2010 that was me) all the 'what-ifs' - just sending hugs. cry a river of tears. your baby girl was with you at the end. she felt safe that you were there. much love and Kleenex. x

We got it as one way ticket holders (I'm Aussie citizen and hubby on spouse visa) and we just explained at the check in that we were emigrating. Nothing more than that, and they were happy to allow what we had. I think we had 120kg or just over between 5 fam members. say 126kgs if I remember right...

ahh Marta, lucky you to have little feet etc... more shoes to fit in the luggage when you go back and visit, as long as they have enough room for your shoes to wait for you :laugh: x - you might want to buy a suitcase for the shoes and get that sent to your fam's house... :biglaugh: I'm a sucker for Next handbags and Next boots (tall ones)... but we actually had a $400 M&S bill that included school pants and shorts (at 9GBP they were much cheaper than the 'dockers' here and 500% better quality - so 8 of them 2-trousers, 2 shorts each for 2 boys) and a few business shirts and a couple of things for me, it was like christmas and arrived within a week of ordering! Visa did ring us for suspected fraud... and sounded disappointed when we said it was a genuine purchase! :embarrassed:

HI Everyone, we are nearing our one year anniversary and we have accepted it and keep the ashes with us. Our other cat Natasha is doing well, we keep up with the Frontline spray every 2 - 4 weeks (expensive but better than $1000's in vet bills & worse), but I am vigilant to check her every night/ every second night. She spends a lot of time outside. The vets around St Ives/Turramurra/Pymble/Wahroonga are all really upset as ticks cause havoc all year round - and it's so widespread, although the adult part of the cycle is the most dangerous, and nothing is 100% just vigilance, even indoor animals have to be careful as these critters can go on humans too, be brought inside. We have a new 'neighbour' which is the spitting image of Sylvester and odd to see him at the back door. Tash was pretty distant when Vesty was alive, but now she's the boss and seeks lots of attention. The kids are keeping me to my promise of 2 years after Vesty is gone, we would consider another pet. I'm sure Tash has other ideas! Have a lovely day and love your pets! x

Thanks Nicky, I don't regret bringing him, but I do feel responsible. And unfortunately it was a lesson I learned a hard way - I'd just become less vigilant as he was really a house cat, and hopefully by sharing it'll help protect your loved pets. Sylvester didn't have a chance having no immunity to ticks, and we find one on our other cat, Natasha every few days, even with the Frontline spray every 2-3 weeks. In addition to this, it can be fatal after between 2-6 days of an adult tick landing on them. (ticks have a 3 stage life-cycle and feed and drop off with the first two stages). If you do find your cat acting mad like it's full moon - even if it is, and they will probably be scratching the area, so check for fleas and ticks. I almost ignored Tash's mad dashes round the house, but searched her anyway and found one. And since losing 'Vesty' I have been known to chase the cat and check her if she's having a mad moment round the house at 2am. Hopefully by being exposed to ticks, she'll build up something that will help in delaying the devastating paralysis I found Vesty in. As I'd bought the Frontline spray from the vet, they offered to spray Tash for free, and I could bring her in every two weeks and they'd do her for me. I think the vets are so upset as they were full of tick cases when I was there, and it's hard for them too. When I took her in, it was the day I picked up Vesty's ashes. I was glad to have 'him' back with us, but the tears started again, and I had a final really good cry. The box is lovely and he sits - good as gold, inside the cupboard where he used to love to hide away. Thanks for letting me share this with you all! and go and give your pets a good hug.

Also Quigs if you end up near the beaches, every Sun ( or is it Sat) morning, the kids have Nippers - from now till Feb. It means the kids get to play games on the beach and learn about water awareness and the parents get to help out or get to know others (loads of diff nationalities). And the sausage sizzle at the end of it is particularly enticing. My niece does it at Manly, it was too busy for us, and we live far away from the beaches, so a bit too much, but we got the kids into football (aka soccer) and now is cricket season as well. We live in an area of lots of South Africans and other ex-pats, so it's actually really good to have people who know how darn tough it gets emotionally, and you'll be fresh from the whole move. Exhausted and wired too. A wierd upside-down hot end of year, and Xmas itself, and New Year brings a whole box of emotions when you've freshly left home and family abroad. So once you get here, get yourselves in with the school, whatever social stuff you can be part of to then meet your new friends who know what you're going thru and can help get you through those tough times - birthdays etc. Then eventually you'll have to learn about rugby league, union, AFL which I have no clue about and will say no more. Amazing time, and whirlwind. Keep your head about you, stick together, talk openly in those quiet times, and realise emotions are high. Breathe. Every so often look around you at those 'memory making' moments with family and friends that you will remember fondly. You never know if you don't give it a go. And if it doesn't work out, you can always go back. (in case you feel that this snowball of moving is going too fast in one direction and you think there's no turning back. It helps sometimes to know you can go back.)x

Yup, your OH could catch the Manly ferry to work if she worked in the CBD, not a bad way to commute, but when you get in a car, you may want to avoid going cross city as the Bridge/Tunnel tolls and then cross city motorways can really become expensive. It is hard when you don't have a reason to stick to an area. Freshwater is further out than Manly, and perhaps you get a bit more for your money. The traffic around the beaches is a nightmare. If you are coming here for the beach lifestyle, then you should really look at where you can have that lifestyle. Go on domain.com.au for renting and buying so you can see what prices are affordable for what options you want. Just the two of you means you can get a small place to start renting and build up some savings. We are upper North Shore (Turramurra/St Ives/Pymble) and it is far away to the city and a good schlep to the beach, but easy for Chatswood, and we got a pool - for now, going to move in Feb/March ;-(! We are renting properties that we wouldn't be able to afford. And then there are a lot of tradies who commute from the central coast (Gosford/Woy Woy) where property is cheaper, and the F3 is free to come on the motorway to Sydney. The train is quick and on time with a lot of them esp during peak hours (for your OH if you have the car). Some great beaches that way too. We left our house and most savings over there as it's not worth the exchange. We are just waiting to see what happens before we make any 'big moves' financially. Depending if your house (in UK) will finance itself if rented out (once agent's fees and insurance are paid). Ours hasn't for 6 months, and now breaking even, but that keeps us in somewhere, as we just aren't in the market to buy when houses here are $800+ (we are a family of 5 - too noisy to be living in an apartment). And all the apartments beign built round here cost the same as a house anyway! good luck with all your choices. the world really is your oyster!

Hiya! Congrats on the growing family and the move while heavily pregnant! What a woman! Northbridge is the focus at the moment for you with that being the workplace. The bus is the main form of transport (not near any trainstation, really) so if you are looking at you (mummy Helen) needing the car, and hubby doing public transport (as we do), and so many others too, that it's a good place to start. I can't remember the numbers but you can search which bus routes, and then look at rental properties based on a radius from Northbridge. (surrounding suburbs search, etc on domain.com.au) Will you ship your car over? (you may need to hire a car until yours arrives) or if not, you'll need to spend money to buy one - depending if you can get a loan based on hubby's job contract - but may only give it to you after his 3mth probation - assuming it's a new job-new company, rather than re-location with same company. These kinds of expenses eat into any savings you bring over, as does bond on a rental property and set up costs. From friends and relatives who lived in Neutral Bay in an apartment complex that had pool and close to parks, you have that option - apartments vs house, depending how central you want to be. I don't really know the realestate round there, I think a lot has been subdivided into smaller plots, so it would really be what is on the market - Jan is the most popular time for rents being higher, and I have found it can be easier to get a cheaper rental from March to September. I grew up in Middle Cove (2068 postcode, depending how close you live to Eastern Valley Way - bus route and busy road) but Willoughby (same postcode I think) might be better for you - bus to Northbridge, good fresh fruit shopping (High Street) and nice atmosphere, plenty of parks - lots of young families, close to Chatswood (major shopping area). And grab a map and look at places on Domain.com.au or realestate.com.au. We live around St Ives, but wil move to Turramurra - on the train line and there's a lot more room this far north - we're about to move out of a house with a pool (it sounds nice but pretty old and needs a good refurb), bills are expensive especially electricity. don't forget you'll have lots of expenses setting up here, telephone and utilities, and new furniture if you are not shipping EVERYTHING - even then there's the wait while it gets here. Don't want to worry you... but that's the harsh reality, it's scary how quickly you go through money when you start out here. And Huggies nappies aren't as soft, so we opted for Aldi (we were told their nappies are much softer - personal preference) but you might need a car to find your nearest one... Our local shop is Woolworths - like Asda/Tescos for food. I haven't found any of their nappies to be good for one reason or another. With the baby on the way it might be worth looking at a short term rental 3-6month furnished place, so you can get your bearings, live comfortably etc while you are waiting for your stuff, and you can get a feel for where you would like to live. Just a thought. Hope this helps. It's so hard to know what to do/expect. Good luck, it's a huge move, but good preparation pays off. I'd say pack as much as you can in the freight (I miss my cooling racks and other cooking stuff - but it all costs to replace what you throw out and will need in your new life), and take a good lot of your little girls toys in the luggage on the plane, so she at least feels something is familiar with all the new stuff going on. Nearer the time, PM me if you are needing a cot when you arrive/baby is near arrival. Actually, just realised it's not that far away. yikes. Just let me know. Isabella

Thank you again. And glad I helped Pumpkin become aware of these horrible ticks. As some of you have written about near misses especially after collection from Quarantine, Sylvester (our rec deceased furbaby) crawled into the engine of the borrowed A-class Mercedes the day I picked him and Tash up from Eastern Creek. I left them in the garage to slowly get them used to the new surroundings. Tash came out, and 'Vesty' decided he was happy to get himself lodged into the most difficult place - in front of the engine. Luckily I'd felt under the car, thought it was a 'sealed unit' and had turned the key half way. Looked under again and saw his paw and some fur poking out. So I guess while he didn't have markedly nine lives, he did have a lucky escape and we enjoyed him for 9 more months. Today: The 5 year old heard the 22mth old say 'miaow' at the cat box in the garage. 5yo perked up and said, "is Vesty home from the vets"... husband's reply, 'no he's not coming home'. And we exchanged sad smiles. Well, it's not entirely true, we will get his ashes back after 2 weeks, and he'll be back with us, in a way. And we have to accept - that's as good as it'll get. Hope all your pets are well and happy. x

If any of you have received stuff posted internationally to the UK they tax goods over the value of about £30 (what I can remember), is there the same here to receive goods here in Aus from the companies listed - over a certain value? My hubby had to pay almost £20 in tax to Royal Mail as he'd got an Ipod sent over from USA, ended up no cheaper, and the following week they fell in price as a new one was launched! argh! I've also heard Monsoon, but not sure. Am scared as I will end up maxing out the credit card for some 'decent' stuff that's affordable - even with the shipping! ASOS rocks!

Thanks everyone for your well wishes. We have been in puddles, and I'm sure it will ease. I cleaned out the shelf yesterday - male cat wee is a shocker, and cried, but it was cathartic. Also had just been to Woolies and bought about 30 tins of catfood (special at 77c a tin!) And had to put all the surplus stocks in a box in the garage. Before Tash went out today I just about drowned her in the Fronline spray. As ironic as it is, I was on EBay while Sylvester lay in the cupboard ordering the Fronline plus topspot. While the vet said he'd been diagnosed at stage 3C - out of 4 stages, she said he'd go downhill for two days and then pick up. But her initial prognosis she said she was pretty sure he'd make it. I felt otherwise. In hindsight I think rather than leave him at the vets sedated (in my own selfish way praying for a miracle that he'd turn the corner), it would have been kinder to euthenase him. Like Que Sera Sera said, guilt is a useless emotion. Horrible as it is, and thinking that if I'd not gone on my first shopping trip alone into town on the Sunday - that I would have found him... so many if only's. I really appreciate your words of wisdom and advice, because my local friends don't seem to get it. Having had him around always. I just was too late in lots of ways. The pain is easing, and it'll be nice when we get his ashes home in a box, to keep him with us for when we eventually have our own 'forever home' he'll be there. x