London - that blessing and curse. Any advice?

We are considering a move to Melbourne from London - myself, my husband and two children. I have read so many threads where people have moved from London to Melbourne and have said that it's a great move - so easy! I haven't lived in Melbourne for 15 years but my instant response is incredulity that London and Melbourne have similar culture. Given that my children stand to have some family, instead of the current none, would anyone think that I would get to Melbourne and despair in the limited cultural opportunities and wish to high tail it back to London? I am frustrated that I am prioritising culture and proximity to Europe over other benefits, but I grew up in Melbourne. I had a great childhood but would I say better than anywhere else? Better than holidays in France, Spain, Portugal? No. Has anyone else ever felt similar or is it just me? I caveat this all by saying I think I am so scared to return to Australia as I suspect, given our finances, that we will end up having to stay there, whether we want to or not.

I have posted this is MBTTUK as I am wondering if anyone has been driven back to the UK not for finances, not for family, not for friends, but just for the UK?

This really isn't the correct forum for your post I don't think. Your last line could be a post on its own in MBBTUK but the rest of the post is about moving to Aus and Melbourne and what it is like now and how people find it. Its possible Melbourne has changed from when you grew up there.

Perhaps split the 2 and have as separate posts in different areas and you may get some feedback in both areas.

Lots of people move back for family reasons. Who can tell you whether you will like it back here or not. I am not one who likes going on holiday with the rest of the world so living in Aus suits me fine. I like to have minimum tourists on hols with me. Fortunately I went to sea with my husband before we had children and was able to enjoy the no tourist on the ship thing and not many tourists around thing. However if you like crowds stay where you are and go with the flow. Culture it depends what you are interested in, aboriginal culture is aplenty as you will know, however if its old buildings and falling down buildings then stay put.

Sorry you just have to work it out for yourself, there is no one fits all solution. Only you know your family and what you want. As for having no relatives, I have minimum and its always been the same, it has its advantages as well. No competition, no lots of presents to buy, no having to visit this one and that one.

Hope you work it out and as has been said this is two posts one for going back and one for coming so you may want to put another one in the migrations forum.

I may have misunderstood, but are you saying you're worried about moving, may not like it and move back? Fears and doubts are common (I know!!!). Just make your decision and go for it, whatever it is. However, like so many, once moved there (most likely) will always be the little ... hmmm, what if I ....

What are you actually looking for, for you and your family?

I most certainly left Australia twice, due to in a large part the tedium of life here and the social conservatism not forgetting the missing of a world status city as London.

But it was some years ago, decades in fact, when life was easier in Australia, just dull. Melbourne was far from the flavour of the time, although never lived there, visited a bit, it wasn't anything very special, nor had the somewhat over hyped sense of self, as it sometimes displays at present.

These days Melbourne is considered the closest equivalent of Oz cities to London, or a slight European ambiance. It has much improved. But it is still an Australian city. Most live in suburbs, with little happening, must drive to get anywhere and so on and so forth.

I'm not saying it's a bad city. Far from it. Perhaps a worthy substitute for London if living in Australia. But not so comparable though.

Saying that we gave London another try in 2010. I returned to my old stomping grounds in W2 and found it of reduced interest than a decade before. A lot of the buzz had diminished. Partly I expect as a lot of the action had moved Eastwards as well as prices had prohibited the 'more' interesting people out.

All the best anyway. Melbourne is not bad. Your from there so would have a far better knowledge than me and have family there. Just don't be surprised to miss the London 'vibe' and Europe of course simply can't be replaced. Melbourne is reflecting Asia in ever greater presence. You could change your interest to our nearer neighbours.

Not sure about Melbourne - never spent any real time there. With regards Europe v Australia I would suggest that the diversity and culture of Europe certainly trumps Australia. I have family that recently moved from Aus to London - they are loving it there, but then they are still young. Maybe a trip out to Melbourne to see how you feel? A lot can change in 15 years.

Melbourne is great. Always something happening. Plenty of sporting events, arts, theatre, music etc. And you can go to the beach without fear of sharks or stingers or crocs like up north. Only negatives are the long winter (good if you like AFL or snow sports) and traffic (especially if you have to commute from the outer suburbs). Tomorrow I'm off to the city to the National Gallery of Victoria for the David Hockney exhibition then to Chinatown for dinner, then Crown Casino for drinks and a punt - so there is plenty for me to do on a hot summer's day. Good luck.

We are considering a move to Melbourne from London - myself, my husband and two children. I have read so many threads where people have moved from London to Melbourne and have said that it's a great move - so easy! I haven't lived in Melbourne for 15 years but my instant response is incredulity that London and Melbourne have similar culture. Given that my children stand to have some family, instead of the current none, would anyone think that I would get to Melbourne and despair in the limited cultural opportunities and wish to high tail it back to London? I am frustrated that I am prioritising culture and proximity to Europe over other benefits, but I grew up in Melbourne. I had a great childhood but would I say better than anywhere else? Better than holidays in France, Spain, Portugal? No. Has anyone else ever felt similar or is it just me? I caveat this all by saying I think I am so scared to return to Australia as I suspect, given our finances, that we will end up having to stay there, whether we want to or not.

 

I have posted this is MBTTUK as I am wondering if anyone has been driven back to the UK not for finances, not for family, not for friends, but just for the UK?

I have never lived in Melbourne, but visited a few times and don't think it is anything like London, where I did live for a long time. London is London. Melbourne is Melbourne. Do you have any pull factors for Melbourne, other than you think it might be a bit like London?

In all honesty, you are not displaying a lot of enthusiasm for Melbourne in this one post anyway. Unless you do have some strong pull factors that you have just not mentioned here, I would have to think your mind and heart are not in this move at all .. in which case there is your answer.

I would definately stay put. You really don't sound as if your heart is in it at all. You won't find another London anywhere else anywhere and certainly not in Australia.

I have lived in Melbourne over 40 years and I can say that the Melbourne of 10 years ago is totally different to Melbourne now. The tourists have found Melbourne for one thing. Jeff Kennett might have been a horrible man but he did a great deal for our city and it has continued since then. Can't comment on my place of birth ( London central) so much now but last time I went, apart from the obvious and fantastic tourist destinations, I thought it was dire. No soul, no community but then , as a child, I was spoilt because we all knew each other and we grew up together as post war baby boomers. We all left and I guess that is the issue. Of all the cities in Australia only Melbourne and Sydney have that lively big city vibe .

Jeff Kennett is not a horrible man.

He is a great man.

He did good things as premier and he has been wonderful as the chairman of Beyond Blue.

He has strong opinions and expresses them but there is nothing wrong with that.

Is there any city that hasn't changed in the last 40 years ?

It would be a worry if they hadn't.

Thanks for your responses...I guess it's true that my heart is not in it. I'm only considering this move for the sake of my children, but even then I don't know if it is something which they stand to benefit from. The love going out and about in London as much as I do. I suspect we will have a great two years, but then want to come back to London but doubt it would be financially viable. I am heavy into art history and I know the NGV has fabulous exhibitions, but it's just not on the same scale as here. I guess I spent most of my formative years in Australia learning about European history and art and so now being in Europe I feel like I am in the "right" place. I don't love crowds, quite the opposite, but will pay that price if it means going to amazing places with falling down buildings. I appreciate Aboriginal culture exists in Australia but the whole history of how Aboriginals have been treated sits extremely uneasy with me (I have already given my two kids a potted history, even though they are very young and it is not pleasant). And yes, I do appreciate that the British had their share of unsavoury history - but it just wasn't as recent.

I guess I need to consider other factors too and look at the whole picture as a whole. Life would be a whole lot more easier if we had a house to keep in London...

I don't know about British history not being unsavoury in that same timeframe. A great deal has gone in in the world the past couple of hundred years, including more recent times. The politics of a country may well be an influence in a decision to move but to base it on the history of a country, what has gone on, then the UK's hands are probably just as murky in ways you may not be aware or care to know about.

As has been said, sounds like you don't really want to go so I'd not really bother pushing it. If you remain in London then you have to probably accept your situation and that it may not change (ie renting over buying) and be content with what you have there overall.

Thanks for your responses...I guess it's true that my heart is not in it. I'm only considering this move for the sake of my children, but even then I don't know if it is something which they stand to benefit from. The love going out and about in London as much as I do. I suspect we will have a great two years, but then want to come back to London but doubt it would be financially viable. I am heavy into art history and I know the NGV has fabulous exhibitions, but it's just not on the same scale as here. I guess I spent most of my formative years in Australia learning about European history and art and so now being in Europe I feel like I am in the "right" place. I don't love crowds, quite the opposite, but will pay that price if it means going to amazing places with falling down buildings. I appreciate Aboriginal culture exists in Australia but the whole history of how Aboriginals have been treated sits extremely uneasy with me (I have already given my two kids a potted history, even though they are very young and it is not pleasant). And yes, I do appreciate that the British had their share of unsavoury history - but it just wasn't as recent.

 

I guess I need to consider other factors too and look at the whole picture as a whole. Life would be a whole lot more easier if we had a house to keep in London...

What do you mean 'for the sake of the children' ? Please don't tell me you are one of those who thinks Australia is magically better for children as it really isnt. As others have said you don't really seem to be totally behind this idea of a move.

Thanks for your responses...I guess it's true that my heart is not in it. I'm only considering this move for the sake of my children, but even then I don't know if it is something which they stand to benefit from. The love going out and about in London as much as I do. I suspect we will have a great two years, but then want to come back to London but doubt it would be financially viable. I am heavy into art history and I know the NGV has fabulous exhibitions, but it's just not on the same scale as here. I guess I spent most of my formative years in Australia learning about European history and art and so now being in Europe I feel like I am in the "right" place. I don't love crowds, quite the opposite, but will pay that price if it means going to amazing places with falling down buildings. I appreciate Aboriginal culture exists in Australia but the whole history of how Aboriginals have been treated sits extremely uneasy with me (I have already given my two kids a potted history, even though they are very young and it is not pleasant). And yes, I do appreciate that the British had their share of unsavoury history - but it just wasn't as recent.

 

I guess I need to consider other factors too and look at the whole picture as a whole. Life would be a whole lot more easier if we had a house to keep in London...

There are happy children (fortunately most of them) and unhappy children in both Australia and UK. Two first world countries and your children have every chance of being happy and leading fulfilling lives whichever country you chose to be in. Moving is such a huge thing and doing it half heartedly is not a recipe for success. I would knock the idea on the head and stay put, you sound happy with your current lot.

If your heart isn't really in it to make the move, but you are unhappy living in London, then why not live and work somewhere else in the UK and have London as a place you can visit?

The he things you dislike are the same reasons that I would never chose to live there and the things you like are the same things I like about it. So, we visit when we want.

When we moved back from Oz in March after eight years there, we moved to Windsor. It is a lovely town, but has the same issue as London with ridiculous housing costs. We were renting a flat and had no hope of buying a place and little of ever even renting a house. Now, we live in a very pretty village in Scotland, but I have Glasgow and Edinburgh on my doorstep for culture and galleries and city life when I want it - I live very rural, but only 18 miles from Glasgow and I can get a quick flight to London for £17. By living here, we now rent a pretty cottage and will hopefully buy a cottage in the coming year.

I can can get a morning flight to London, spend the day enjoying what it has to offer, get the evening flight back for less than £40.

Jeff Kennett is not a horrible man.

 

He is a great man.

He did good things as premier and he has been wonderful as the chairman of Beyond Blue.

 

He has strong opinions and expresses them but there is nothing wrong with that.

 

Is there any city that hasn't changed in the last 40 years ?

It would be a worry if they hadn't.

While Kennett did some good things. for example changing the left turn priority rule at intersections, I struggle to think of anything else.

I worked in the Victorian health system when his government was in power. Ambulance and state health care was decimated, it took many years for both to recover. So much data was "lost" we will never know really what happened.

What do you mean 'for the sake of the children' ? Please don't tell me you are one of those who thinks Australia is magically better for children as it really isnt. As others have said you don't really seem to be totally behind this idea of a move.

I have to admit I like the buzz of London. London and New York are the centre of everything.

The Australian pace of life for me is too slow and far too conservative which means it was rather dull most of the time.

There's not much down there, but sometimes its that simplicity and quietness is what many go looking for.

For some, they don't know anything else.

Thanks for your responses...I guess it's true that my heart is not in it. I'm only considering this move for the sake of my children, but even then I don't know if it is something which they stand to benefit from. The love going out and about in London as much as I do. I suspect we will have a great two years, but then want to come back to London but doubt it would be financially viable. I am heavy into art history and I know the NGV has fabulous exhibitions, but it's just not on the same scale as here. I guess I spent most of my formative years in Australia learning about European history and art and so now being in Europe I feel like I am in the "right" place. I don't love crowds, quite the opposite, but will pay that price if it means going to amazing places with falling down buildings. I appreciate Aboriginal culture exists in Australia but the whole history of how Aboriginals have been treated sits extremely uneasy with me (I have already given my two kids a potted history, even though they are very young and it is not pleasant). And yes, I do appreciate that the British had their share of unsavoury history - but it just wasn't as recent.

 

I guess I need to consider other factors too and look at the whole picture as a whole. Life would be a whole lot more easier if we had a house to keep in London...

I do appreciate that the British had their share of unsavoury history - but it just wasn't as recent.

You obviously haven't looked at Irish history in the last 50 years. Pop over to Derry and have a chat with the people who were part of the civil rights movement in the 60's. Or even just watch the film In the name of the father as a starting point.

Anyway, things are a bit better there now and I digress.

I live in Sydney, about to move to Perth. I find that Melbourne is the most European of the Australian cities and has the best culture (depending on your definition) and vibe to it. No stupid lockout laws, nice friendly people (more open than Sydney), good sporting and musical events (every touring band does at least Sydney & Melbourne). But then you get 4 seasons in 1 day and soaring temps in summer. Cities are constantly changing and should be. Sydney was far better before Casino Mike and the fun police came to power. Wait for the royal commission in 10 years about how it all is/was property scams.

I think you need to be clearer for your reasons for wanting to move. It sounds like it is so your children will be closer to family, what age are your kids?

Also London is changing and I know a lot of people who are getting out post Brexit. Do you want to live Nigel Farage's Britain/London? A lot of jobs are already being planned to move to Dublin, Paris, Frankfurt, Luxemburg. I have never lived in London and never had the desire to. The best part about the London is the easy and cheap connections to go somewhere else.

What exactly is 'Nigel Farages Britain' lol. That isn't where I live, well other than the fact that Farage lives in the same country. What do you imagine has happened since the vote ?

I worked in Victorian Government when Jeff was in and I was ashamed to say I did - he decimated Melbourne - he did not do good things - can't think of one QUOTE=parleycross1;

Do you want to live Nigel Farage's Britain/London? A lot of jobs are already being planned to move to Dublin, Paris, Frankfurt, Luxemburg.

Did you get that from BBC or Sky News ?

This is Theresa May's Britain at the moment.

The FTSE is way up over 7000 points, the economy is soaring, a low pound, record numbers of tourists are arriving, investment is pouring in and the world is queuing up to trade with us.

It's all good.

Did you get that from BBC or Sky News ?

 

This is Theresa May's Britain at the moment.

 

The FTSE is way up over 7000 points, the economy is soaring, a low pound, record numbers of tourists are arriving, investment is pouring in and the world is queuing up to trade with us.

 

It's all good.

Yeah yeah that's all well and good but Nigel Farage.

Let's not start getting too off topic please. :mask:

Thanks for your responses, again. No, I don't think Australia makes children instantly happy - it's just personal circumstances for us: family is a big one. Our wraparound care is not great (we have been on a waiting list for after school care at the school for almost a year). The kids desperately want to live in a house and have a garden and I rather foolishly thought that this would be achievable for us. Brexit is a good point, as I work in financial services, and there is a certain level of uncertainty around the impact on the sector. But that swings in roundabouts too: negative growth for Australia in the last quarter and a prediction of an impact on jobs in the next year from the AFR.

As a plus, I have started buying lottery tickets again. :wink: