every migrants nightmare

[Stuju]

Hi Spence,

I have been in oz 2 years this august coming and i am still very home sick and would go home tomorrow - unfortunately we would have a very hard stuggle to start again in the uk and at the mo not in a position to take that chance, i feel myself that a trip home for a few weeks would ease my homesickness and hopefully give me a different view on living in oz - but maybe im wrong i really dont know and i cannot find out as yet becuase we only have one wage coming in and i could not afford the flight back.
All in all i guess what i am trying to say is that a 3 week trip home for your wife maybe the answer and may just make her see oz in a different light.
All the best
gizmo

[pjw]

hi spence, i really feel for both of you, it's an awful situation, i've been there! going home so early is going to make her want to be home, you really have to give it time, When i came here, i spent many hours in the travel agents!! ultimately, i knew, going "home" would have put a huge strain on my family, so i decided i couldn't go back too early. you never stop missing whats important to you, but you learn to prioritize. good luck, paula.

[lynnmarsh52]

You are definately not alone!!

We lived in Brisbane for nearly a year in 2006, and things are not that great once you get back! As "arahcall" states, nothing changes when you get home. I still haven't found a job since coming home - I'd previously worked in the same job for 12 years - I don't see any of my friends - even though they said they missed me terribly when we went - don't see hardly any of the family - again, missed us terribly apparently - and nothing else has changed! Except for maybe there are more stabbings, shootings, murders, rapes, and the rise in council tax - again - the weather is the only thing that has stayed the same! Don't see that as a good thing though do you?????

I regretted coming back after about 3 mins of landing in Gatwick!

I too felt that I couldn't settle, but one thing that annoyed me the most was that although my hubby didn't want to come back to the UK, he very willingly said we'd come back. At the time I thought that was really sweet to put my feelings before his own, but I do so wish that we'd have sat down and talked about it. I feel that he made it too easy for us to come home. My 9 year old son cannot wait to go back - he's suffering at the hands of bullies in and out of school at the moment, so I know we are definately doing the right thing for him by going back.

It's very hard to make a decision to keep everyone happy. Comprimise seems to be the key - not that that is my strong point - I like to have everything my own way! Hence dragging my family to Oz, then back to the UK, now back to Oz again

You HAVE to talk to her - it's certainly not worth ruining a relationship for, but I can't help but think that she would be making a huge mistake in rushing back to the UK. You can always go back - we are heading out to Perth once the house has sold - but it becomes very costly. Probably cost us around £30,000 in selling, buying, reselling and all that gumph! I was adament that I wanted to go home - now I can't wait to go back.

TALK TO HER AND FIND OUT IF THERE IS ANYTHING YOU CAN CHANGE IN OZ TO MAKE THINGS BETTER/EASIER FOR HER! DON'T RUSH BACK HERE

[debbiewakelin]

hi we are a family of four from the uk nottingham and just started to apply fot the TRA all looks complicated we have a six year old girl and a nine year old boy and want to get him out of the uk because secondary school will soon be upon us and they are getting worse over worries me and im sure that kids would have a better life over there you have been and what do you think now you have done both uk and oz

any advice would help

thanks debbiexx

[lynnmarsh52]

Hi Debbie

Without a doubt - OZ!! When you first move over to Oz, it's natural to feel unsettled, but when you feel unsettled all you can think about are the negative points. You don't think about all the negative things back in the UK - all the reasons why you left in the first place! It wasn't until I came back that I realised what a mistake I'd made.

But, saying that, everyone is different. My 9yr old is definately an "out-doors" type child, which is practically impossible in the UK. In Oz you are nothing but out-doors!

All I wanted - first time round and this time round - was for someone to tell me that we were doing the right thing, but only you can make the decision to move.

I'm sure you will know in your heart whether you are doing the right thing or not. You can only try!

As practically everyone on here will tell you - you won't regret your decision to move to Oz - it's a fabulous place - just make sure you give yourself time to settle and adjust to "life down under"!!!

Best of luck - Lynn(37), Marsh(34), Tate(9) xx