proud preston

@Blue Manna I love the sound of quizzes and games! We try to cajole our 20 and 22 year olds into playing games but ‘no can do’ . They grace us with their presence over dinner then back to bloody computer games in their rooms!

I’m unsure if this post is still active? I logged on to the HMRC app but am unable to prove my ID as my UK drivers licence is out of date (expired in 2016) Any advice how I can get past the ‘prove my ID’ stage without having a current UK drivers licence? I’ve only recently obtained a new UK passport …purely for the purpose of trying to pay into my NI to get the UK pension later on. Thanks

I’ve also thought about splitting it into 3 flights and staying a night in Singapore and then a night in Dubai to try and give the poor body and mind a break

I swore I’d go business class then saw the price and was brought back to reality. Yes, the crowds get me too and just the whole idea of being cooped up in a plane 35,000 feet up makes my blood pressure rise with anxiety

@Jon the Hat I think jumping in the sea or kayak on the river sounds good. I’m not sure when I’ll next get back to England as I found the flight this year bloody awful. Perfectly good flight but I’m just so exhausted during the flight and a week after. It’s horrible- as as know. Plus…..so expensive

@InnerVoice Sounds a lovely memory. I was born in 1969 and i certainly remember - maybe late 70’s? - when it snowed and the magical feeling going out on my own at night, around the streets, building a snowman. The freedom of the UK in the 70’s! I then remember a Christmas in rural Ireland about 20 years ago where it was thick snow. Beautiful. Another Christmas in Ireland - 10 years ago - my own children experienced that magic of snow.

@ramot- what a gorgeous picture! And yes - I only remember a few times like this but so beautiful. I love the quiet that comes with snow.

Thanks all. Wise, and comforting, words. Enjoying that time with my immediate family- as the ripple effect from my negativity is not good for them! Recognising the ups and not focussing on the downs and doing things differently. I appreciate the responses

I’ve lived here 17 years (and posted a lot on here about my homesickness!) I always find this time of year particularly difficult. It’s so damn hot here in Brisbane and I find the heat hard. I look longingly at winter pics in England. I miss the Christmas that I grew up with. Miss friends, family and….winter (!) What little nuggets of wisdom can others offer for me to try and get into the Aussie Christmas spirit and ease my negativity? Thanks all

This response is purely my experience. I’ve struggled with regret and remorse since we migrated. Many reasons- but leaving mum behind features heavily. I am the youngest of six and was very close to mum but hubby wanted to move here. I miss not having been able to spend time with mum, do errands, help out and just be that emotional support - particularly in her dementia days. We are all different but it’s a sadness that will continue to bother me. However …..I never really wanted to come here whereas my husband imagined life would be so much better. As others have said- what do you really want? 17 years here and I’m still wishing we hadn’t moved but our adult kids have no desire to go back. This is what they know. All the best. Damn hard decision

@SophW Marisa’s response is spot on. I feel I can’t ever leave as the kids (adults now!) have no intention of returning to England/Ireland. As I often jokingly (?) say ‘self imposed exile’! Wouldn’t be so bad if Aus was nearer. I dread the thought of that awful flight. Going back in 2 days and feel nauseous just thinking about the long flight.

@Gary H love your response. I need to screen shot this and re read it.

@OzukOzuk oh my word! I’m in England visiting friends and family and had that realisation too- I’m neither English nor Australian. English friend talking about the careers they are in - same as mine - but widely different from mine in Australia. Talking about things they watch on telly. When I’m in Aus I can’t ease into conversation about things that are uniquely Australian. I feel I don’t really fit in anywhere anymore and feel sad about this. However …….as much as I yearn for all things English - I do (eventually) realise my life in Aus is a good life (albeit missing family and friends) England seems very costly now. My home town has shops and pubs boarded up - as many UK towns do. I’m craving for an England that doesn’t really exist any more. The word ‘hiraeth’ comes to mind often We moved over when our boys were 5 and 3. I’ve been homesick for 16 years! but……(especially on this trip) I really do realise that our life is good in Aus and I can continue to visit the UK. You’ve time on your side. I do believe it’s very common - with migrants who scatter all over the world - that longing for familiarity. I’ve spent far too long thinking about the UK and really missing out on ‘enjoying the moment’ (!) in Aus. We are so fortunate that we have this choice - even though it drives us crazy. All the best. You’re not alone in your thoughts and feelings.

@Chortlepuss- all that you’ve said about Britain (the good stuff) -yes! Cold climate for waking in. Spring etc. The heat in Brisbane is intolerable and I tend to hide away. Only go for walks if it’s early or late in the day. Too entrenched to move to a cooler part of Aus.

@Marisawright I left home too when I was in my early 20’s- uni and travel. That’s the expected / norm but I think I would have felt strange if mum had left me and gone to the other side of the world. Although adults, they are both living at home and still young. If it was a short hop to somewhere closer - NZ - then maybe I’d feel a bit different- but a different hemisphere? I can’t do it. If they go - fair enough- but I can’t go and know they are both here. As a side issue - I still have remorse and regret that I did move to the other side of the world when my widowed mum was in her 70’s. Missed not being able to see her regularly. I often think it’s the weirdest thing to do ….move to the other side of the world when you’ve a good, close family etc. Often it’s one partner in the relationship that has more of a yearning to migrate. Still saddens me that I missed so many years with mum and now she has passed - that’s it. No more chances.