Indecisive

After months of debating, looks as though we are going to go back to the UK - after 11 years. What I'm wondering is whether to ship all our household stuff over to the UK or just sell it here and buy new in UK. We don't have huge amounts of stuff, but a couple of decent mattresses, new couch, baby cot, TV and computer equipment, and of course kitchen equipment. Actually now I write that down it's probably more than I thought! I think the cost of shipping would be worth it as to buy all up new again in the UK would get really expensive but just wondered what most people on here tend to do. Also, has anyone taken their car over to the UK? I have a Subaru, worth about AUD12k. Could probably sell it here and buy something much better for the same value over there but has anyone considered taken a car over?

Very interesting reading. I also love the idea of being able to go out walking as a family with our dogs. Sounds silly but at the moment being Sydney siders it is almost impossible to go out for a proper walk wth the dogs as they're not allowed anywhere.

I agree with Bungo, I forgot to add to my reply, that whilst a lot of my friends have considered the idea, none have actually done it because they're just not up for the commute

aahhh welcome to the dilemma so many of us Sydney siders face. Many of my friends have considered moving up there, as they look to move from renting to buying anf buying is just out of the question in the desirable suburbs of Sydney. Personally, I wouldn't do it. It's just too far and as others have said, door to door the commute would be pretty long. Also no matter what the view of Aussies going home early for a Bar B on the beach is..the reality (in my experience of all my friends working in the city) is that people generally work long hours in Sydney so you might end up feeling like you never see your family. Fantastic beaches up there though! Also a GREAT opportunity to move now and one that might not come up again...can you come and rent for a while and see if it's doable? Or negotiate with your company to give you a pay rise when you move? Haha might sound ridiculous but when I moved out here 12 years ago my company dropped my pay on the basis that at that time the living costs in the area I was moving from in the UK were way higher than the living costs in the area. Yes, I was probably stupid to let that happen but my point is that if you have really good negotiation skills (unlike me!) you may be able to persuade them to up your pay if you are to be able to make it work...

Hi LostMyWay, No worries about the waffle! It's actually really interesting hearing your story. I agree that it must be very freeing for people who feel totally settled. I think that for the rest of my life I wont feel totally settled (first world problems, I know!!), knowing the life in the other country. I think I could talk for hours on the pros and cons of living in each country. Although I want to go back to the UK I certainly appreciate what Aus has to offer. But when we were younger living in Sydney certainly was amazing - all the amazing restaurants, out drinking and socialising all the time. All that stopped when we had bubs, and I'm not complaining but I guess your priorities change. Each time I say goodbye at the airport to the parents the pain gets worse and worse and now...seeing their faces as we leave with the baby is heartbreaking. I realise we're in an extremely fortunate position in that we have dual passports so we do have the option to come back to Aus. My mothers group has been similar for me - a great support group but they talk about their families a lot and it breaks my heart that my parents aren't seeing little one all the time and seeing her grow and change all the time. I think hubby will go back to the UK if I keep carrying on about it, but like I say then I have to live with the fact that I've forced him to move away from a country he loves. I honestly don't know what the answer is, but for now I'm just making the most of being here, living by the beautiful ocean, drinking the good coffee :-) We would hopefully go back to the countryside where our dogs can go on long walks - nowhere to walk dogs in Sydney! Must be a struggle being so tired with pregnancy and having a little one to look after and no family to help out - not sure I could do it!!

Hi LostMyWay! thanks for your comments. It does make me feel less weird that Im not the only one that feels like this. You see, all my friends here in Aus that have also come out from the UK and have kids are so settled and never want to go back, they think I'm insane! You're right about property, in a lot of cases a move back from Aus to UK would make it a lot more affordable to buy. We're lucky in that we bought here a few years ago, in an area that (touch wood), is holding its value so we could sell here and hopefully buy in UK. It's very difficult that hubby and I can't agree on this - I envy that you are your husband agree, if you both agree on then at least there can be no blame if it doesn't work out. I am so worried my husband will give in as he wants me to be happy but then he won't be happy himself and resent me for it. Very difficult!

Hi Veeps, what a dilemma indeed. All I can say is good luck with that decision, it makes it very complicated with the teenagers. I guess it makes my situation look pretty straightforward!

Hi Huggy, Firstly, sorry to hear that you have health issues. Wow 3 weeks - not long! Great time to be heading back. I am quite envious that you and your husband are both on the same page with regards to going back, it must make it a lot more straightforward. Mortgage free would be great - are you selling property here in Aus and do you mind me asking which are in the UK you're going to?

Hi Quoll, thanks for your comments. I think you're right - it is going to be difficult no matter what we decide to do as one of us is not going to be happy! I often talked about going back to the UK once I had a baby but I don't think it really sank in with hubby. He;s agreed that we can go back 'next year' but I suspect he's only agreed to that on the chance that between now and then I'll want to stay here. Your comments about your sons are very interesting - how they view their isolation as a family. I grew up with a large extended family who I was very close to but my husband is an only child with no cousins that he is close to him. I;m glad to hear lost of happy kids and parents there - we get a lot of negativity about the UK from our friends which certainly is not helping my cause!

Hi everyone, This is my first time on this forum so sorry if this topic has come up before! We moved to Aus 10 years ago. Husband loves it here, me not so much. I have always wanted to go home at some point for me it was just a matter of when. We now have a baby and for me the time feels right to make the move. I want her to grow up knowing her family and being around her grandparents, just as I did. I also think there's a possibility with house prices the way they are that we could sell here and buy in the UK and be mortgage free - a massive pull factor! For me there is nothing more important than family and I want to make the move while bubs is little and my grandparents can have quality time with her. Problem is that my partner really does not want to go. He just doesn't feel the same way about family. Just wonder whether anyone returned to the UK for similar reasons and are glad they did it. I'd love to hear some positive stories. All our friends both here and in the UK think we're insane for wanting to return to the UK! And before anyone says it, yes, I realise it would have probably been a good idea for me and husband to have agreed this before having a baby :-) Thanks!