Country vic

My 2 cents... settle it. Many of us have fantasies about fighting a just cause and wining against a bigger opponent, that why The Castle is such a popular film but it is fiction. It is highly unlikely a free legal service will use their limited resources on a trivial case, a decent honest paid lawyer will advise you to settle, a delusional one will tell you what you want to hear ..... until your money runs out. Its very easy for people to offer 'advice' from a safe distance, but they are not the ones paying the bill or coping with the stress. I have some experience of legal proceedings, until you personal experience of it you do not realise how appalling and evil the judicial system is. Justice is a myth in every court whether criminal or civil, it has little to do with justice, the side with the most money wins. Ask a woman who has been to court on a rape case, almost invariably the victim will say the cross examination was more traumatising than the original crime, that fact should act as a warning to anyone considering going to court. Lower courts, dealing with less serious matters, are no different. For people not used to it court procedngs are very stressful - is it worth it. People love to say 'it's the principle' those words are music to (some) lawyers ears, the honest ones will tell you to drop it, settle and get on with your life.

Yobs on bikes, yobs in cars, yobs in the pub yobs everywhere so what, it doesn't matter, it is irrelevant. Even if I think (rightly or wrongly) someone is a yob I will still do whatever is needed to see I do not hurt them and protect myself. Truck v car = car loses, one of my most frightening road experiences was a truck trying to kill me, god knows why, there are some very scary people out there. The bigger you are the more onus is on you. The case of the 'yob' who smashed that poor kids face in for hitting his car was a disgrace and another symptom of the anger out there, the courts let the offender off, maybe he will kill someone next time. Keep safe everyone.

Exactly that is the point, drivers must accept the onus is on us to behave In ways that protect those who are more vulnerable. We alway have a responsibility look out for cyclists, pedestrians, kids, mobility scooters, learner drivers.... etc. Read any running or cycling forum, some of the things people do are weird. I have had plenty of abuse and intimidation I have not had a beer can thrown at me.....yet.

Bath university did some research into this and the evidence is cyclists are in more danger in some situations. Personally if I am going for a serious ride I would put on all the gear regardless of the law, but if I was going 500 meters down the road to pick up the local rag I wouldn't.

There are people who brag about bullying and abusing cyclists, hating cyclists is one of the few 'socially acceptable' forms of bigotry. If we feel it's imperative that ID's are important in case of accident, or sudden illness, that seems to me an argument that everyone should carry photo ID at all times. Sadly bodies are often found that take time to indentify, some are never identified, I doubt if a law requiring ID would change that. As for who is careless or dangerous, or who is fault, you seem to have missed my point..... I can not do anything about other peoples attitudes or behaviour but I do choose my own, I choose to do everything I can to show care to other people as well as myself. This is partially for selfish reasons, being involved in any incident is something I want to avoid. Being 'right' would be of little consolation to me if someone's was hurt or killed, whether that is me or another person. When I see people driving across a give-way into my path I choose to take whatever defensive action I need to to protect myself, I can't see lying in the road saying 'you should have stopped I had right of way' is going to help me to feel better. We can all make a choice to be more patient and understanding if we wish....or not if we prefer. Another consideration, some years ago I had received an urgent call to get to the hospital, I left work and drove to pick up the persons pets, I remember driving straight across a roundabout (one of those small ones we see on back roads) I imagine anyone seeing that would have thought what an idiot, shouldn't be in the road. When I see people do things that look crazy I always remember that time and consider that I do not know what is going in in that persons life, maybe they just had a call that one of their children was involved in a serious accident, who knows. I am sure I have made many driving, walking and cycling errors, I hope that people will choose to demonstrate understanding that I am flawed and don't see my many imperfections as justification for me to die. The 'provocation defence' rarely works for me. Jails are full of people who genuinely believe it's someone's elses fault they are there. If someone (an idiot perhaps) bumps into you, deliberately or otherwise, you can choose to point out how wrong they are, or you can smile and move away. Remember the days (in the UK) when someone walked into you on the pavement and you apologised to them : -) Peace, patience and compassion everyone......

Where I live there are a lot of mobility scooters and few pavements so they use the road, should they have special ID and insurance. Because of the lack of pavements, and the appaling state of the pavements we have, people with pushchairs, people in wheelchairs and who use walkers also use the road should we be angry and intimidate those people or show some maturity slow down, wait and give them room. If they get hurt because we demand our right to use the road as we like do we blame them because the road is ours and they don't pay road tax or insurance. I ride a bike (and drive) but not much these days, the (mostly male) anger out there is very disturbing, then there is the total carlesness, mobile phones, speeding, failure to obey give-way signs, opening doors without checking, distraction etc. it all made it to dangerous. if you want to experience how bad and selfish drivers are ride a bike for a week. I would like like to ask angry, selfish and impatient drivers, say you are involved in an accident and a cyclist dies and it is the cyclists fault (i make mistakes as a cyclist) you go to the coroners court and again it is ruled the cyclist was at fault are you happy about that or would you wish you had taken more steps to protect the cyclist. if it was you at fault would you justify the killing on the grounds that cyclists don't have licenses, you don't like them and, arrogantly, believe the road is yours and you don't care about anyone else. if a child ran out in front of your car and they died, would the fact that it was their fault make it OK, my point is calm down, look out for other people, be proactive in your own safety and that of other people. Patience, kindness, consideration, maturity ....... we could all have more of these qualities. Car v bike: there is only one outcome, bike loses, once someone is dead who is right or wrong becomes irrelevant surely.

First a disclaimer, I am not qualified to comment as I have no family...... however I will not let that stop me. You talk to your sister, she gives you a hard time and makes you feel bad..... solution: stop communicating with your sister. You are accepting her making you feel bad and you can do that if you want to, alternatively you could choose to tell her your communications are inappropriate and distressing for you so, until she chooses to show you more respect and consideration, you will not be commnicatng with her. The fact is people die. We could go live next door to someone, go out for the day, come back and find out they have died. We can choose to live as hostages under the tyranny of what might happen, or we can live in a balanced way accepting the reality of life events and understand we can not control everything. While statistically it is likely your parents will die before you, there is no rule that dictates it will be that way. :- ) I was doing this as the previous post went up......

I understand for many reasons, we rarely hear the truth the whole truth and nothing but the truth. As well as 'feedback' it has to be 'constructive' so you set the rules by which you expect your 'feedback' to be delivered. Maybe some of you would like to share the 'feedback' you have received, 'overqualified' perhaps :- ) Whatever works for you.

I do have a success story of a close associate of mine. Odd work and education history, but eventually he gets a job in the public service, we had all thought at 30 he was to old as he was competing with 20-25 year old new grads. Anyway all going well but a few years later decided to leave for some weird job, madness we all said, what is he thinking, unsurprisingly weird job didn't last long, tried to warn him we all said, so more education, some unemployment ... Now he's 40 checkered history, competing with 30 year olds, not a hope we all said, better look at self-employment, wasting his time trying to get back into the public service at his age, no old school contacts or helpful mummy and daddy, wasting his time we all said. Then.... he gets a managers job in the department of 'god knows what they do....' none of us could believe it but we all had to hand it to him for his persveance against the odds, seem to be going well for him. So a lesson to us all sometimes perseverance does pay, he refused to give up, turns out he had had a few interviews in various government departments and finally it paid off.

OK in these bigger firms and government departments with qualified HR managers and lots of staff with nothing better to do (reminds me of an episode on Utopia) offer 'feedback' however, I would question how honest it is. HR departments are about avoiding liability. The OP was given 'feedback' but they didn't like it. It it is up to the OP to figure out for themselves, honestly, why things have not worked to date. When I see news stories about people who say 'I have applied to 500 jobs and not had one interview' I feel like shouting out 'stop doing that' if something is not working stop doing it. Time to reassess and do something different. Generally people are applying for the wrong job, something they have no realistic chance of getting, or they are applying for the right job in the wrong way. There are government funded agencies who get paid to offer employment advice but beware and proceed with great caution, these agencies vary significantly in their skill and integrity. I think it would be better to research online (Dr Google for job seekers) and see what employers there are saying. Remember people do not tell truth 'how are you today' 'nice to see you' ' we must have lunch sometime' 'of course your bum doesn't look big in that' 'it's not you its me' ' I am not looking for a relationship right now' .....post your favourites. People have good intentions, with some lies they genuinely don't want to hurt your feelings, no one wants to hear 'do you seriously think someone like me would be interested in a loser like you .. ' yep I know plenty about rejection:- ) I remember a woman I worked with had a rather unprepossessing daughter who went for a job interview, they told her she was 'overqualified' her mother decided to phone the would-be employer and demand an explaination, I heard her side of the call, one part 'so you just said that to let her down lightly' it was obvious to all of us that this kid was overqualified for nothing but her mother chose not to see it, it was a bit sad really. Sometimes we have to understand that we are being lied to and see the truth for ourselves. One thing that does bug employers (if not most of us) is a sense of entitlement.

How many people have you employed. Busness owners, company managers and HR departments have more important things to worry about than whether the OP gets a job. Employers get so many people demanding attention, everyone wants something. Its like your junk mail, you may have quick look if you have time, then it goes in the bin, or cold callers, maybe you have a chat and buy the product, or offer the cold caller advice on how to sell, I hang up or don't answer my phone. How would you feel if the firms that spend a small fortune publishing and distributing their junk mail (or tele-marketing) demanded you give them your time and attention and buy something, or explain why you won't and offer your 'feedback' to help them (for free) with their marketing. Maybe a poster here will give you job or find you one - talks cheap...... Back in the day when jobs were advertised in print I knew a manager who would bring 60-100 applications every time he advertised (some managers get 100's) do you seriously think he spent 30 minutes on each one and offered one on one advice to the 99 who didn't get the job, most were lucky if they got 20 seconds before they went to the reject pile, on top of that there were the unsolicited applications and calls. Anyone who has ever had a high street store (or other business) knows how many people come in looking for something, then there are the endless calls and of course junk email, it gets old.

As I understand it the explanation that you can't work in a gaming store, if you don't know about current games, was information that was volunteered rather than extracted and, let's face it, it's pretty obvious that a job like like requires a person will a real interest in the purpose of the store. There are many reasons people won't employ you (or go out with you) how often do we tell a person, truthfully, why we don't include them in our social invites, unless we want to hurt their feelings. if you have ever been an employer you will have learnt to be careful what you say, not just because of potential legal trouble but rejectiion can make people very angry, who wants a confrontation. Personally I wouldn't employ someone who smokes, I don't have to ask someone if they smoke it's obvious but I am not going to say because I don't want a smoking argument. If someone turned up wearing a cross, that's off putting for me, if someone feels the need to portray their religious affiliations to me it's not going to work, one of the most (if not the most) important things in a work place is that people get along, that they fit in. As for someone using me as research for their job hunt, seriously, this idea that complete strangers owe us something is one of the problems. If I liked the person and I thought I could offer a suggestions that would be welcome and helpful I might but don't demand or expect it. Let's say to be 'helpful' I suggested someone got their teeth fixed or changed their hair, do you think I might get a punch in the mouth :- ) best not risk it, if your wife askes 'does my bum look big in this' what do you say... I have often heard people complain about not being called back, that is a misguided attitude in my view, you are expecting time and effort from a person who owes you nothing. Like those cold callers who phone when you are eating dinner, bet you love all that, especially when they act like you owe them something. Look at the other persons perspective, it's not all about you. Sounds to me like you are being very random in your job search, why did you apply to be a dog walker, do you have an affection for dogs and experience with them, would you walk into a child care centre and expect a job without suitable qualifications or experience ?? Why did you apply to a gaming store when your could not name the top games - get real. Are you being honest with yourself, do you know why you are being rejected but pretending not to. When someone says 'does my bum look big in this' they know the answer they just pretend they don't and they want you to lie to them so they can fell better for a few hours, what is there to gain from saying 'yes it does'.

I would second the suggestion of considering getting an ABN, simple enough online. Do you have a tax file number?? There is cleaning (and other) work out there but to be self employed you really need your own gear and insurance. Some places do 'cashies' but anyone with any sense knows the dangers of that so you either have to provide a tax invoice or tax file number and get paid through the books. Have you asked around motels and hotels they often need casual cleaners but they often want experience, professional cleaning is very different from housework and it's hard work, they want speed and attention to detail. Cold calling to businesses can be counter productive, personally I get irritated when people come here unannounced and expect me to give them attention without any consideration for how busy I may be. So put yourself in the other person situation, people often don't like cold calls so you will have to use your judgement on that. Do you have something to leave if you do call into places, I am not saying a 'war and peace' CV just a one page contact details sheet including tax file number and email contact, most will go straight into the bin (with the junk mail) but there may be some that get put onto a notice board for future reference. Some places also want a police check, not sure if you can get that for yourself. There are always people who succeed in getting work, even in a hard job market. Even for basic unskilled work attitude and image are often more important than qualifications and experience. No one owes anyone a living so it's up to you to keep trying in appropriate, realistic ways. As for asking for explanations for rejection, I would warn against that, it's unlikely you will get the truth anyway and no one owes you an explanation. Imagine if someone asked you for a date and you said 'no' would you appreciate being interrogated as to why.

Are there any blue or pink people ??

I watch these threads, from what I can see they very rarely result in any genuine useful outcome. The usual suspects will post the obvious...have you tried...I am not anywhere near you......good luck..... There are promiseses that never amount to anything, or more handball to something else, a bit like contacting the council and they tell you to contact DPI who then tell you to contact the council...... I have watched people and, it seems to me, real friendships are not part of Australian life, locals mix with family or people they have known since there were young, they may have acquaintances, here church is big, but few of those people are real friends who would be allowed into the inner circle. Australians do not want or need outsiders, that is why outsiders seek national groups or religions, it's something to join. Anyone who dares to say how it is will be slapped down and blamed, making it easy to believe you are a tainted person who deserves to be marginlised, of course I don't now you but in my observation it's more likely you are simply a victim of how things are here. No doubt there will be those who will tell you how easily they made wonderful friends here and it's your fault if you are not as welcomed as they have been. If that is true why are they not meeting up with those here who are not as gifted as them and offering real companionship and introducing others to their wonderful circle friends. People are also possessive of their family, they are theirs and they won't share them with you. Differnce is not acceptable here, so if, for example, you don't drink that will make you unwelcome in many situations, you must agree with them on everything and mirror their behaviour, above all you must agree that Australia is the most wonderful country in earth. I understand how depresing it is to feel you have tried everything available to you and all you get is a smack in the face, and it's not much comfort to realise it's not because you are an unworthy person, it's the way it is for many (if not most) people. So you may get the disingenuous friendliness, people will smile to your face and exchange a few fake pleasantries but don't expect to be invited in beyond that. You will be welcome when you are spending money, but that won't lead to anything beyond work and business. Keep trying (maybe set a time limit) but if nothing gets better, I would advise reconsidering whether to stay, if you keep hoping things will change if only you try harder or change yourself, you may find 20 years have gone by and you have learned to live a life of acceptance and it's now to late to move on and look for something better.