andyperiam

Hi, I am in the midst of planning a move back to the UK from Sydney. I would like to initially ship a couple of boxes back just with clothes and some documents so they are already their when I arrive later in the year and they will be followed once my home sells with the remaining furniture etc... can anyone recommend a reliable cheapish company for the 2 box send ? Many Thanks Andrew

Wow, you have bought me to tears. I am not a bad person and I know that, Just need my wife to see it! My kids and wife are everything to me. I look around my home and we have lots of photos of our family everywhere, all those good memories. I know those memories won't ever dissappear but I had/have dreams for more memories to be created as a family unit. Unfortunately I think my wife made a rash desision in saying she hasn't loved me for 2 years. Not sure why but I think she is now scared to delve down and find what has caused that. I truly beleive we can work out any problems and really think it selfish of her not to at least confront the problems and just shut the door on 12 years, two kids, alll those memories etc.... She maybe feeling that now she has told all her family / friends that it is too late to change her mind. Anyway 3 days ago I sent her a message which simply said "Hi, Just wanted to let you know that I love you very much and am hear for you when you feel ready to talk" Very hard for me not knowing what is running through her mind. Andrew

Hi, Yes I have so far had 2 over the phone councilling sessions and 1 in person. They do help. Just really don't understand why my wife doesn't want to. Though she says she had had 1 over the phone but I actually doubt that now after talking to my councillor as her advice from what she tolds me was to go with her feelings and move on. When I mentioned that to my councillor they said that would rarely if ever be adivice given they would always advise couple councilling.:sad:

Update for anyone interested. I am giving my wife as much space as possible. Last night she was quite talkative and I am playing Mr Nice and doing all the right things. Today she is seeing a lawyer just for some info.(I hope) I have written a long list which goes like this. What I value in my wife What I feel I need to change What I value in Myself What I feel she needs to change I have also been looking into, via the net on how to fix a marriage. Interestingly every piece of info states that our problems are fixable and the issues we have are very common as long as we can agree to work on them. All I really need now is for her to agree to receive my list and write one of her own that we can discuss at length, either on our own or with a councillor I still feel I have only a 0.00001% chance of saving my marriage. Found out yesterday from my Mum who is an Fb friend of my wife's that one of my wife's friends suggested a dating site for my wife. Not sure how I can stop her friends from interfering like this but trust my wife enough that she would also think it silly

Hi, Thank you, It has now been a full week since my wife told me. My moving back to the UL comments was an emotional reaction. Certainly couldn't do that. This is certainly going to take time but my wife at this stage wants nothing to do with even attempting to try and work out our problems and that is what I find so hard to take. I strongly beleive our last 12 years, 2 kids all those memories which are clearly displayed around our house are too much to just ignore. Anyway, I broke the news to my parents last night by phone (they are in the UK) They are devastated. They have also sent a wedding anniversary card to us. I sure that will be greatly appreciated by my wife !!!!!!!!!!

Hi, Agree, My moving back to the UK was a rash thought. Unfortunately I haven't made as many friends here as I should have. I will be staying around to support my children. My wife is calling the councillor today, but has no wish to discuss any problems with me. It appears her mind is already made up. I think that is what is hurting me the most, that she cannot even be bothered to work at our problems or have serious conversations about our issues. It appears she has no faith in councilling as her friends advice appears to be the gospel.

Hi, I had a phone councilling session this morning. Want to try and have my wife do the same and then we can go together. I told my wife today that I am serious about working things out between us but her response was that it won't change how she feels as she has been supressing her feeling for some time. Doesn't look good at this stage

Thanks all, It is very difficult. At the moment I am hoping my wife and I can work out our differences. What she states as a reason for divorce are quite simple things to fix in my opinion. I certainly don't want my kids to grop up without their Dad and have a replacement for me in their lives. That would utterly destroy me. Not quite sure what is going on am just shocked at the moment that it has come to this. I love my wife dearly, always have, always will.ut I cannot force her to love me back.

Hi, I have lived in Sydney for the past 15 years I am from the UK, and been married to an Aussie girl for the past 12 and have 2 young kids aged around 9/10. Looks like sadly my wife and I will be getting a divorce. I may move back to the UK as I have wanted to do that for a number of years though the wife wants to stay here. Has anyone else moved back without their children and if so how did you cope. Really looking for some friendly advice as I am really cut up and don't know what to do. Manhy Thanks

Agree, I keep telling myself that if required we can get assistance with his learning after school hours and all will be good. Everyone says that young children can adapt far better that adults can.

We are very close to making the final decision on whether to return or not. I think the only thing at this stage that may make me stay is that I want to be as sure as possible that my kids will be OK at a UK public school, they are 9 and 7 and the 9 year boy old struggles currently at school with his reading, Maths etc... so I am worried he will not fit in or be even further behind when he moves to the UK.

We are in Sydney. I grew up in Warwickshire, just outside Stratford Upon Avon. My family still live there, our reason for moving to Worcestershire is it seems easier for me to get work, maybe with a commute to Birmingham. What part of Warwickshire are you from?

Hi, Thanks for the advice, very helpful. We are at the final stages of making the BIG decision whether to stay or go. I am having sleepless nights worrying about if the kids will settle OK in the UK. It is posts like yours that really help clear my mind and make me think that I worry too much. Really looking forward to hearing more from you. We are planning moving to the UK later this year to the Worcestershire area.

Thank you to all who replied. Good advice and I think more than anything it helps put my mind at ease. My son is very popular at his current school so I am sure he can fit in anywhere and as long as he is happy, then so am I

Hi all, I am wanting to move back to the UK after 15 years here. My OH is also keen to return. My iconcern is my 9 year old son who is currently in a good private school in Sydney and if we return we are going to place him in the state school system, due to cost. He has a few learning and confidence issues and struggles with his reading/writing & maths. I am very scared that he will not fit in to the UK school system and am wondering if other people on the boiard have had similar worries and how they hanfdled it. We are looking at returning to the Worcester area. Many Thanks