I discovered this website weeks ago and Its a god send. I've bored my friends so much, its fab to come on here and have people going through simular or have been.
I'll explain my situation.
I met my aussie boyf in Sydney almost 3 years ago whilst I was doing my travelling, we spent an amazing 6 months there together, fell in love and I totally fell for the Sydney lifestlye, I couldn't believe how lucky I was! For me, Sydney really is the most amazing City in the world. Anyway, so we stayed strong and I came home, I missed him so much but it was only making us stronger and more aware of what we wanted. He got his visa and came to London to work, we eventually moved in together to comply with the De-facto visa. We've been living together almost a year next month, so naturally we'll apply to go back to Sydney. In the mean time, things haven't been so good between us. Basically, he hates life in London and it isn't for him, fair enough-it is hard and an unforgiving place. We've worked hard to keep the relationship going but with him being depressed at being here, its been so so hard. I know that once he gets back to syd with the sunshine and the life he has, it will be better but in turn I have to then get used to life without family. I have a couple of good friends there so I know I won't be alone, I'm also a sociable girl and will definately be keeping busy! But I wake up every single day and its the first thing that comes to my head, that I'm leaving here to start up there. And I know I will have such an amazing life there should I go for it, but I need motivation at the moment. My man can be shy and is bad at showing his feelings but I think he doesn't appreciate what I'm effectively giving up. I know it will be good but I just have to get to that better place with him.
My friends are saying that I have to be 100% sure that I want this before I go, fair enough, I'd be saying the same but its hard when you know your man will get back to normal given time!My family are ok even though we are close, my mum knows that this is what I want therefore she's willing to let me go, my sister on the other hand cries down the phone and my heart breaks when she does. Its like I'm dying or something and people keep saying-better make the most of it! I just feel like running away from it all at the moment, so many decisions to make and we haven't even started the visa yet! We've been together 3 years in August and I love him whole heartedly.
Can anyone offer any advice/in the same situation?
Hi there Sammy G,
I am sorry to hear what you are going through and sympathise with you immensly, You dont say how old you are...
I Know that your friends say that you need to be 100% sure, but if you love him as much as you say you do, you would at least want to give it a try.....Nothing is final, and if it didnt all work out your friends and family would welcome you back with open arms, If it was me i would rather of tried and failed than gone on never knowing if you were giving up on the best oppertunity of a lifetime. Look at it this way I think anyone would be depressed in this country, when they have come from where he has, and he has left everything over there for you, because he obviously thinks you are worth it.
Give it a go girl you have nothing to lose
good luck
Kimx
The de-facto visa is an initial 2 year temporary visa and, if you are still together after 2 years, they will then make it a permanent visa. Permanent or Temporary, you are allowed to leave Australia any time if it does not work out but with the temporary visa, you have to leave if the relationship breaks down. So check to see if you can qualify for a visa in your own right if you have skills and experience otherwise, go for it but be aware that your life (visa) is in his hands for that 2 year provisional period.
Thanks Kim & Tony for your comments. Its wierd seeing advice on a webpage just for you!!
I am 26, as is my man.
It is so nice to have this website.
Your right, I don't have anything to loose. I'm just scared about how I'm gonna feel when I get over there! But if I don't do it, I shall never know. Life is too short for regrets.
Have a lovely weekend,
Take care,
Sammy XX
Hi Sammy, Im not sure if you are around tonight but we all meet up in the chat room later for a laugh and a bit of fun to help us all through the emotional termoil. Please come and join us i might make you feel a little brighter
Almost Crunch time
