My story is a little bit of mix of everyone else. basically my mum and Dad split when I was 9. My relationship with my mum has always been amazing and the thought of leaving her really does break my heart. Over the years I have been her rock and I worry what she will do when I am not there.
My dad on the other hand is a prize git!!! He has spent my entire life pressurising me to do more and be more (even though he hasnt amounted to much himself). Anyway, no matter what I achieved it was never enough). he remarried and I can not stand his new wife, same she cant stand me. Andrew&Karen I can completely relate to your story. My dad has always out his 2 step children first, which I just dont get. Both are complete drop outs, my step siser got pregnant by a married man yet it was all exciting when her baby arrived. When my eldest was born there was never a fuss. In fact not once did my dad visit my eldest on his own my step sisters little boy was aways there so Charlotte never got a look in. Ayway 2 years ago my brothers girlfriend had a bit of a run in with my dad at which he stated that he only kept in touch with my brother to see his grandson. For me this was the last straw and I contacted him to say stay out of my life (admittedly I did this my tect as I knew he would emotionally blackmail me out of my decision). he never even responded to my text and 2 years on I havent heard from him. I have since had another little girl and not even a card to acknowledge her. I know you may be thinking well...thats what you wanted. It si but I thought he would have put up some kind of fight..I'm still waiting. My Grandma (dads mum) was gutted about the situation but I think even she realises he is a git.
So here I am 2 years later with my amazing little family unit of 4 and I just want the best for my family. I will be sad to go, and even now a part of my wonders if my dad will even try to contact me before I leave the country forever. Deep down I know he wont and I cant really explain why a part of me wants him to. I guess its cause hes my dad.
I am so sorry I really have bleated on now!!!! Anyway, I look forward to a fresh start and no baggage with our new life in Oz.
Take care all of you
Toni
__________________
Craig (Java Developer):GEEK:, Toni (HR Manager):wubclub:, Charlotte (3 1/2):jiggy: & Kiera (15 months):cute:
Dec 07 - Decision made to move to Oz
April 08 - ACS skills analysis sent off
Well Here Goes .... I Grew Up In A Family Of Me I Sis And My Brother .... We All Have Same Mum But I Have A Different Father .... Didnt Bother Me As A Child But Now I Have Kids Of My Own Epecially My 19 Yr Old Daughter Would Like To Know Her Real Grandfather [which Will Never Happen ] .... My Parents Have Insisted All My Life They Have Never Treated Me Or My Kids Any Different From The Rest .... But I Know In My Heart They Have And This Has Recently Applied To My Daughter As Well ... This Has Caused Major Ructions In The Family And At This Point In Time I Am Not Speaking To Any Of Them Except My Brother And His Family ... This Doesnt Really Bother Me Too Much As I Have Always Been Self Sufficient And They Have Needed Me More Than I Needed Them .... When I Was Growing Up I Met My Best Friend At The Age Of 8 [she Still Is ] And She Lives In Oz [perth] She Had 8 Other Brothers And Sisters [2 Of Which Are Also In Perth] So As Far As Im Concerned I Am Moving To Be With "my Family " ... Imo Being Blood Related Does Not Mean Being In A Family .... Its The Way You Treat Each Other Be It Good Or Bad ... And Stick By Each Other No Matter What ... Something I Feel I Sadly Have Not Got From Mines . Phew !!! Thank God Got That Off My Chest Lol
Mrs Keily
__________________ TRA SUBMITTED 17/05/07 RETURNED UNSUCCESSFUL 13/06/07 ..RESUBMITTED 26/07/07 ..PASSED 30/08/07 VISA LODGED 31/08/07 .. FULL ACK ..17/01/08 PC26/03/08 MEDS 23/04/08 C/O 11/04/08 VISA 30/05/08
I understand what you are saying about your dad, I have thought the same sort of things, 'will he bother to get in touch before we go' etc. I know aswell that he wont. But its him that will be missing out in the long run. Like yourself, we have 2 beautiful children and 'they' are what are important. Like you say, Look forward to your new lives in Oz and know that you will all have a better life over there.
I understand what you are saying about your dad, I have thought the same sort of things, 'will he bother to get in touch before we go' etc. I know aswell that he wont. But its him that will be missing out in the long run. Like yourself, we have 2 beautiful children and 'they' are what are important. Like you say, Look forward to your new lives in Oz and know that you will all have a better life over there.
Best wishes
Kirsty
Hi Kirsty - Thanks for your words. Family is such a mind blowing mess your head up thing that I think I am best off away from the temptation of 'wondering' about my dad. I agree that its them that miss out not us. Good luck to you hon...where are you aiming for in Oz???
Love
Toni
__________________
Craig (Java Developer):GEEK:, Toni (HR Manager):wubclub:, Charlotte (3 1/2):jiggy: & Kiera (15 months):cute:
Dec 07 - Decision made to move to Oz
April 08 - ACS skills analysis sent off
Well Here Goes .... I Grew Up In A Family Of Me I Sis And My Brother .... We All Have Same Mum But I Have A Different Father .... Didnt Bother Me As A Child But Now I Have Kids Of My Own Epecially My 19 Yr Old Daughter Would Like To Know Her Real Grandfather [which Will Never Happen ] .... My Parents Have Insisted All My Life They Have Never Treated Me Or My Kids Any Different From The Rest .... But I Know In My Heart They Have And This Has Recently Applied To My Daughter As Well ... This Has Caused Major Ructions In The Family And At This Point In Time I Am Not Speaking To Any Of Them Except My Brother And His Family ... This Doesnt Really Bother Me Too Much As I Have Always Been Self Sufficient And They Have Needed Me More Than I Needed Them .... When I Was Growing Up I Met My Best Friend At The Age Of 8 [she Still Is ] And She Lives In Oz [perth] She Had 8 Other Brothers And Sisters [2 Of Which Are Also In Perth] So As Far As Im Concerned I Am Moving To Be With "my Family " ... Imo Being Blood Related Does Not Mean Being In A Family .... Its The Way You Treat Each Other Be It Good Or Bad ... And Stick By Each Other No Matter What ... Something I Feel I Sadly Have Not Got From Mines . Phew !!! Thank God Got That Off My Chest Lol
Mrs Keily
You are exactly right, unfortunately we can't choose our family. I think a lot of us would chooses a different one! LOL. The madness and disfunctionality of my family is made more obvious by the fact that my OH family is very normal.
Hi Kirsty - Thanks for your words. Family is such a mind blowing mess your head up thing that I think I am best off away from the temptation of 'wondering' about my dad. I agree that its them that miss out not us. Good luck to you hon...where are you aiming for in Oz???
Love
Toni
We were originally looking at Adelaide, but after many hours of reading these forums, we are being drawn more to Perth (maybe better workwise for us, hubbies a mechanic. Where are you heading? what stage are you at?
Well Here Goes .... I Grew Up In A Family Of Me I Sis And My Brother .... We All Have Same Mum But I Have A Different Father .... Didnt Bother Me As A Child But Now I Have Kids Of My Own Epecially My 19 Yr Old Daughter Would Like To Know Her Real Grandfather [which Will Never Happen ] .... My Parents Have Insisted All My Life They Have Never Treated Me Or My Kids Any Different From The Rest .... But I Know In My Heart They Have And This Has Recently Applied To My Daughter As Well ... This Has Caused Major Ructions In The Family And At This Point In Time I Am Not Speaking To Any Of Them Except My Brother And His Family ... This Doesnt Really Bother Me Too Much As I Have Always Been Self Sufficient And They Have Needed Me More Than I Needed Them .... When I Was Growing Up I Met My Best Friend At The Age Of 8 [she Still Is ] And She Lives In Oz [perth] She Had 8 Other Brothers And Sisters [2 Of Which Are Also In Perth] So As Far As Im Concerned I Am Moving To Be With "my Family " ... Imo Being Blood Related Does Not Mean Being In A Family .... Its The Way You Treat Each Other Be It Good Or Bad ... And Stick By Each Other No Matter What ... Something I Feel I Sadly Have Not Got From Mines . Phew !!! Thank God Got That Off My Chest Lol
Mrs Keily
Mrs Keily, I think you summarised that beautifully. Some of my friends mean more to me than my blood family and I treat them as if they were!!
__________________
Craig (Java Developer):GEEK:, Toni (HR Manager):wubclub:, Charlotte (3 1/2):jiggy: & Kiera (15 months):cute:
Dec 07 - Decision made to move to Oz
April 08 - ACS skills analysis sent off
We were originally looking at Adelaide, but after many hours of reading these forums, we are being drawn more to Perth (maybe better workwise for us, hubbies a mechanic. Where are you heading? what stage are you at?
Kirsty
Hi Kirsty,
My OH is a java Developer and we are hoping to head to Brisbane for his work but live on the coast (goldcoast or somehwere similar)
How far down the process are you?
LOL
__________________
Craig (Java Developer):GEEK:, Toni (HR Manager):wubclub:, Charlotte (3 1/2):jiggy: & Kiera (15 months):cute:
Dec 07 - Decision made to move to Oz
April 08 - ACS skills analysis sent off
