split up!

**anitaw** · 11-06-2012, 08:54 AM

Originally Posted by truebeliver

thankyou everyone i really mean it when i say yous are amazing and lovely

your support has humbled me xxxxx

pablo thankyou for sharing that with me i cant belive theres actually more to it you should write a book lol
it must of been absolute hell for you........ i get what you meen as ive clung on to the fairytale of a happily ever after that tbh died ages ago :( now my head and my heart are both saying the same thing i dont think ill ever get rid of the guilt associated with bieng the one to end it though i cant see that ever going away......

Well true believer....OH S..T moved out yesterday. Play this lovey.......it makes me feel so strong and good. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RBOJpIwF47Y Its called fighter by Christina Aguilera
Let me know what you think.

**Sephie** · 11-06-2012, 08:57 AM

I'm so sorry to read what you both are going through anita and trubeliever, stay strong and keep on going! *hugs of support*

**anitaw** · 11-06-2012, 12:30 PM

Thanks Sephie, When the man in your life lets you down and the going gets tough........well.....the tough get going. We women are good at that .

**Missus B** · 12-06-2012, 07:46 PM

I really feel for you, going through this. I recently ended a 7 year relationship. We were due to get married in November last year and I put the wedding on hold, saying that we needed to save for Oz instead. He is my best friend but the love died in the relationship and we were no longer enhancing each other's lives. He didn't want to end things and as a result, we haven't been in contact that much over the last 2 months but gradually we are regaining the friendship. I met someone immediately, which I will always regret.... I wasn't ready and my ex wasn't ready to see me move on so quickly and it hurt him a lot. I have huge guilt about removing him from my visa application. But I know that I did everything to make it work. I made the changes in myself to make the relationship better and his life a bit easier, but it was a one way street. He is who he is and he will be the right man for some woman out there but we just didn't fit together anymore and were just muddling along....I fly to Brisbane to start my new life in October and I feel incredibly sad that I will probably never see him again. But this is part and parcel of life. I'm not responsible for him or his happiness. And it is up to me to make myself happy. Everything else good that happens is simply a bonus.

**Nige Richy** · 13-06-2012, 04:03 PM

Its never easy to split from a partner at all, mine was 6 1/2 years ago after 23 yrs and 3 years before retiring early, 3 great kids but I couldnt go on any longer with things and after getting my financial ar$e kicked, I kept 80%of my pension so I did ok. I have since met another woman and remarried and we are now to embark on a new life in NSW in 2 weeks. There is always light at the end of those tunnels, there may not appear to be at the time but it does get better and easier and I am a firm believer in that things happen for a reason. I agree with many of the other comments made but it is up to you to decide, I did and it took a while but I think I am a much stronger , better and nicer person, my ex will probably disagree and is somewhat envious of my emigratting, she it calls my latest jaunt. Good Luck

**anitaw** · 20-06-2012, 12:09 PM

Well, nearly 2 weeks on and have not been happier in years. Found out on the day EX moved out he had his floosie move in to his new unit Good riddance. He has lost 2 wonderful, intelligent sons. He has lost everything. Now, my life begins with a capital B.
I am so glad I got off my behind from day one and secured our future. If there is anybody there in similar circumstances please message me. After methodical research I really am in a position to advise on the musts you have to do if a breakup is on the cards, especially if you have kids. Love to all, everyone has a story.

**scottishstacey** · 20-06-2012, 12:15 PM

Originally Posted by anitaw

Well, nearly 2 weeks on and have not been happier in years. Found out on the day EX moved out he had his floosie move in to his new unit Good riddance. He has lost 2 wonderful, intelligent sons. He has lost everything. Now, my life begins with a capital B.
I am so glad I got off my behind from day one and secured our future. If there is anybody there in similar circumstances please message me. After methodical research I really am in a position to advise on the musts you have to do if a breakup is on the cards, especially if you have kids. Love to all, everyone has a story.

It's definitely his loss

X

**mickyb** · 20-06-2012, 12:16 PM

Originally Posted by anitaw

Well, nearly 2 weeks on and have not been happier in years. Found out on the day EX moved out he had his floosie move in to his new unit Good riddance. He has lost 2 wonderful, intelligent sons. He has lost everything. Now, my life begins with a capital B.
I am so glad I got off my behind from day one and secured our future. If there is anybody there in similar circumstances please message me. After methodical research I really am in a position to advise on the musts you have to do if a breakup is on the cards, especially if you have kids. Love to all, everyone has a story.

curious from a male perspective , was he the biological father of his sons ?

**Galahad** · 21-06-2012, 07:05 AM

... curious from a male perspective , was he the biological father of his sons ? ....

... And this is relevant because ? ...

**mickyb** · 21-06-2012, 07:23 AM

Originally Posted by Galahad

... curious from a male perspective , was he the biological father of his sons ? ....

... And this is relevant because ? ...

because he's lost two sons . If you leave a partner doesn't automatically mean you've lost your kids . If they're not biological then it may be easier , but leaving a partner shouldn't mean youve left the children and the children shouldn't be led to believe that's the case when it's not . That's why I find it relevant .