Sitting today dreaming of going home(Scotland) again and suddenly wondered " How has this happened to me? "
Honestly I would have put money on us staying,we couldn,t wait to adopt the aussie way of life,meet new people ,take on new challenges and become a 100% aussie . Alas it was not to be and I cant wait to get back.
What I want to know is ....to all who love it here(Congratulations by the way) what has made the move worth all the hard work and sacrifices. IMHO brisbane has offered me nothing that is worth my little one never getting to know her grandparents(and vice versa). We broke alot of hearts moving here and I haven't seen anything that has made it worth while. I just keep thinking people are more important than places.
So why am I different? What is it about Oz that keeps you wanting more.?
Location: Coombabah, Gold Coast from Oldham, Gtr Manchester
Posts: 1,029
I feel pretty much the same way, but now feel like we've got to make it work. My son was due to start reception last september, but here in QLD is not due to start nursery until next january. I'm worried a move back would see him far behind, and he may struggle for years to catch up, especially being the youngest in the class, and a bit behind the others initially anyway. We spent such a lot of money too, and if we went back, would have to buy a smaller house, and have no immediate income, so more savings gone. Plan is to give it a bit longer, and see how we go. I like the gold coast, but as you say, it's people not places. Can't say which way it will go yet, change my mind almost daily.
Good luck with your move back to Scotland, hope you get back on your feet soon.
Jo x
Just popped in for the first time in a while, and was interested to see your post.
We too must have been "different" as you put it. We went, saw, didn't conquer and now we're back in England and loving it!!!
You can only do what you think is right for you and yours, and don't give yourself a hard time no matter what you eventually decide. If it hasn't worked out, so what??? Very few things are irreversable, so just get into reverse if that's what you decide, there's nothing wrong with trying and deciding it's not for you!
A lot of people have said to us that we mustn't feel like we failed...WE DON'T. We fee like we went over to Oz hoping that it would be what we wanted, but it wasn't, so we had a great holiday and now we're back home again. For some it works for others it doesn't.
Try to look at the positive and not the negative. What a fantastic opportunity you've had, and you've seen and lived in a totally different country and culture. If you've decided not to make the move permanent, then that's fine, your life is off on another direction again, more excitement and more experiences along the way.
Good luck with whatever you decide is for you in the long run.
My heart goes out to you.... but please, please, please make sure that you are 100% certain that is where you want to be. So many people seem to come back here, then realise that they actually do want Oz - permanently... and that's an expensive way to decide.
Be sure, and then - when you are - go follow up on what you have decided upon.
Well I have been here 29 years at the end of this month and would go home in a heartbeat. Unfortunately I cant (Dh is an Aussie and I am not going to trade him in for a new model now that I have him almost trained). The longer I stay here the more I hate it and just little things really bug the heck out of me (the cockatoo flock that thinks it is their duty to wake me up with 747 level decibel coverage at some ungodly hour is the current favourite!). I am very fortunate in that I survive by going home for at least a month at least once a year but coming back here (and I usually leave the DH behind so I have to come back) is always a wrench.
Sure there are pingpongers but when you know where you "belong" - and that belongingness has to do with a whole range of things - then you can begin to get on with living a full and exciting life where you are. As far as I am concerned Aus is "bling" - all show and no depth.
If it isnt right for you, dont let yourself get stuck here.
It's a really interesting question - I don't think that anyone fails by going back to the UK at all - you've had the guts to try a different way of life and that should be applauded. I'm not sure what's made it work for us at all - we didn't come with a "we'll stay at all costs" attitude - it's just worked. I did wonder if for us personally if being in our 40's has helped - I know that i wouldn't have been ready for a move of this magnitude when I was younger .
Ali
__________________
"POZZIE" - HAPPY AND LOVIN IT!
I'm sick of following my dreams, I'm just going to ask them where they're going and hook up with them later
Interesting...Having spent a lot of time in both Scotland and Australia, I can appreciate the draw of both. But they both have their drawbacks too...the drunks are a different colour for a start.
But I suspect that the issue here is the wife missing her parents and using the kids/grandparents issue as an excuse for pulling the plug on an amazing life-changing venture.
Be brave - stick it out, I have travelled a great deal with my family and we have always taken a while to settle in each location (Germany, Hong Kong, Brunei etc..) and we have always missed our friends and family, but after a while you begin to adapt to your new environment and accept the consequences, which are generally very positive.
BUT
You have to do what is right for you and your children, and that may not necessarily mean doing the thing that soothes the immediate heartache. I think you'll find that if you return to Scotland, you'll quickly be reminding yourself why you left in the first place. This is your life, you only get one chance.
Please PM me if you want to talk off-line,
Good luck
__________________ Paul & Lisa
176 Visa applied for 02 Jan 08, granted 31 July 08
I did wonder if for us personally if being in our 40's has helped - I know that i wouldn't have been ready for a move of this magnitude when I was younger .
Ali
I have to say that has crossed my mind, I have often wondered and seen that many of the ones that come back seem to be in their 30's or younger..
Sorry if thats a generalisation but I did see that pattern emerging myself, its not based on anything statistically researched.
