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OMG! They said yes!
Posted 04-04-2008 at 03:06 PM by Megss
Well I still can’t quite believe how well that meeting just went (meeting with my husbands ex wife and her husband re: us all emigrating to oz…)!!!!!!! I was expecting a lot more opposition, but it turns out they are just as gagging to go as we are!!!
We did a lot of research last night into the kids schooling so that we could work out the best time to go, and we were startled to discover we only have a very short window in which it is possible to go without completely cocking up the older 2 children’s GCSE/SC and A Levels/HSC.. so we even have a rough date – between June 2010 and January 2011!!!
We were worried about this, because if we can’t go in winter 2010, then the next possible option for the children would be 2015!! (That would be when the youngest would finish her GCSE’s…) by which time my husband would be too old to qualify for Visa, and the two older kids would be old enough to refuse to come!!
We knew that this timescale was six months short of the end of their mortgage commitment, so we were worried they may decide they can’t do it! But they didn’t seem phased at all, and we all decided the worse case scenario would be for us to take the two older children with us, ahead of them, so that they can get started on their schooling at the best time. Which is quite scary for me, the thought of not only going through the emotional turmoil of emigrating, but suddenly becoming a full time mum of two teenagers and dealing with all their emotional turmoil too, is quite daunting! But it is possible.
Now on another subject all together, I spent the last two days with my mum, who has changed her tone considerably. She said;
To be honest all this has really deflated me, and its just making me want to run away from them even more… I know I have hundreds of Sunday lunches ahead of me with them all telling me all the negatives they can possibly think of. My dad has this amazing ability to make me feel like a small child, he was a bank manager most of his life and is obsessed with money and continually goes on about how I should be paying into a pension…. So I know he will find a way of telling me it’s a terrible financial decision and that basically I’m stupid.
As you can tell, my blood pressure is rising just thinking about my family… it’s a real struggle for me to remain positive about this, and by the end of two days my mum even had me doubting my decision! It took 3 episodes of Rex Hunt, and 2 Bondi Rescue’s to regain my enthusiasm!
So after I have finished writing this I am going to write a long letter to all my family telling them the we are leaving, listing my reasons, and then listing all the negative aspects that I’m already aware of – that I don’t need to have rammed down my throat for the next 2 ½ years! And that the only thing I want to hear out of them is that they will be sad to see me go and will miss me – because its not fair to try and dash someone’s dreams like that… they have to let me live my own life and make my own mistakes and follow my own dreams. They’ve all done it, or had the opportunity to, and now it’s my turn.
We did a lot of research last night into the kids schooling so that we could work out the best time to go, and we were startled to discover we only have a very short window in which it is possible to go without completely cocking up the older 2 children’s GCSE/SC and A Levels/HSC.. so we even have a rough date – between June 2010 and January 2011!!!
We were worried about this, because if we can’t go in winter 2010, then the next possible option for the children would be 2015!! (That would be when the youngest would finish her GCSE’s…) by which time my husband would be too old to qualify for Visa, and the two older kids would be old enough to refuse to come!!
We knew that this timescale was six months short of the end of their mortgage commitment, so we were worried they may decide they can’t do it! But they didn’t seem phased at all, and we all decided the worse case scenario would be for us to take the two older children with us, ahead of them, so that they can get started on their schooling at the best time. Which is quite scary for me, the thought of not only going through the emotional turmoil of emigrating, but suddenly becoming a full time mum of two teenagers and dealing with all their emotional turmoil too, is quite daunting! But it is possible.
Now on another subject all together, I spent the last two days with my mum, who has changed her tone considerably. She said;
- that it’s the last thing she would want me to do
- it means we will hardly ever see them.
- they won’t be able to afford flights to see us (absolute bull**** by the way, they are mortgage free and have just inherited 2 considerable sums of money and have just bought a brand new Honda and BMW..)
- I won’t be able to come back if my marriage breaks down (WTF???)
- My dad thinks we’re going for the wrong reasons (just to get a bigger house and that life will be a bed of roses)
- My sister is upset because I won’t be there to watch her children grow up (I’ve been trying for a baby for a year and have doubts I’ll ever have my own – I hardly want to “watch” her spoilt little brats grow up do I? – also I asked my mum not to tell my sister – who is now waiting for me to tell her and act all surprised…)
- All her friends say its terrible, that interest rates are high, health care expensive and the Aussies “are superficial and only friendly on the surface and don’t like poms…”
- And that its all my husbands fault – that he’s taken me away from them, and now he’s taking even further away…..
To be honest all this has really deflated me, and its just making me want to run away from them even more… I know I have hundreds of Sunday lunches ahead of me with them all telling me all the negatives they can possibly think of. My dad has this amazing ability to make me feel like a small child, he was a bank manager most of his life and is obsessed with money and continually goes on about how I should be paying into a pension…. So I know he will find a way of telling me it’s a terrible financial decision and that basically I’m stupid.
As you can tell, my blood pressure is rising just thinking about my family… it’s a real struggle for me to remain positive about this, and by the end of two days my mum even had me doubting my decision! It took 3 episodes of Rex Hunt, and 2 Bondi Rescue’s to regain my enthusiasm!
So after I have finished writing this I am going to write a long letter to all my family telling them the we are leaving, listing my reasons, and then listing all the negative aspects that I’m already aware of – that I don’t need to have rammed down my throat for the next 2 ½ years! And that the only thing I want to hear out of them is that they will be sad to see me go and will miss me – because its not fair to try and dash someone’s dreams like that… they have to let me live my own life and make my own mistakes and follow my own dreams. They’ve all done it, or had the opportunity to, and now it’s my turn.
Total Comments 4
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Hi megss
You just have to follow your dream..with your husband and kids.... i am in the same dilema at the moment... parents thinking we are made, sisiter thinking we are mad...brother thinking are we are mad!!! Friends all for it..expect for one!! Husband has gone withdrawn like a tortoise...worrying about money jobs etc if we get to Oz!!! iam handing it all over the higher things (i know it sounds mad) but i believe in that...its my sanctury!! Both have too try and be positive!! Good luck Shanti |
 
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Absolutely!!! We are having similar problems with OH's mum...Mine all say go for it, but because they have been so positive, I am now doubting their good intentions!!
This is an opportunity of a lifetime....Personally, I don't want to be sat in 20 years time wondering "what if....." I have the chance to try and improve the lives of hubby, me and our six year old son and I will not let comments like " I can't afford to come and see you..." and " you are taking my 'baby' away from me" stop us! It's hard when the people who are closest to you question / squash your intentions, but it is YOUR life! Good Luck in your future adventure!!!! xx Melody xx |
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Megss
You have the opportunity take certain people have had a go at us on here about us going on a studen visa and they are in the UK and cant go to Aus WTF?? You will never please everyone they are just going to have to get used to it. One thing I would say which was hard for me was to keep to the routine you have seeing them. I see my mum every other monday for tea at hers it was really hard to go up this week but we all went. It was not awkward just weird I have not spoken to them about it since I told them about it but I saw mum tuesday and I know she start to want to know a bit more so we will see... You know in your stomach if it feels right and it must do otherwise you would not have said anything. One other thing re children we had advise that there is no point in the children sitting their GCSE's here they are not recognised in Aus and they are better sitting them over there as they are encouraged to stay on plus they will make friends in school and wont feel so iscolated.. Just a thought :-) Keep smiling and start planning how exciting the more things I am getting organised the more excited I am getting... Debzsx |
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GO FOR IT MEGS..................you ARE doing the right thing!!!!! Easy for me to say I know BUT......follow your heart xx
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Recent Blog Entries by Megss
- Where we’re at Autumn 08 (03-10-2008)
- Our Recce (15-07-2008)
- Hello! Long time no speak! (22-05-2008)
- In denial??!! (20-04-2008)
- Telling Family Tomorrow!!!! (19-04-2008)
